Oooh crow, you dirty bird.

I'm so sorry.

I really am.

To all the mom's I secretly judged for feeding their babies formula. I am now one of you. And crow tastes like crap.

To my shame, I have marched in protest, fist high in the air chanting, "Down with formula! It's not food! It will rot your baby from the inside out!" And now here I am, tail tucked under, and I join the ranks of the rest of the "mothers who feed their kids that trash" who like me, only want what's best for their babies. Please forgive me. I understand now.

Because see, I'm a breastfeeding mama who would never give her babies formula. I nursed my other two for 12 and 14 months. Neither of them ever even came close to weaning themselves. But what do you do, when your child won't nurse any longer, and he's allergic to cow's milk (which I'm all "not milk" anyway) and goat's milk (which I'm all "best thing next to Mother's milk" about). What other alternative is left but to give him soy formula. This is not a solicitation for added pressure advice. I'm just sayin.

Annnyway. I am happy to say that since we made the switch from goat's milk he is a much happier baby. The span between feedings has stretched from every 2 1/2 hours to sometimes 4 hours or longer. Let me just tell you, that's a nice change. He's waking up once a night instead of 2 or 3 times.

Now, his skin is still itchy with eczema, he still spits up (although it's not projectile like it has been), and he still has a sensitive gut that vascillates between constipation and diarrhea, but it's better than it was. Believe me. He's not puking all over me, all hours of the day. He's more content to be put down and just play. He cries less. He smiles more. So for this baby, *gulp*, formula = better. Wow. Never thought I'd say that.

Ever.

So no, not everything is as it should be, but it's much much better.

And I'm happy. Because he's happy.