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I really do not know that anything has ever been more exciting than diagramming sentences. Gertrude Stein

02 January 2009

de janvier à décembre

I've said before that I'm bilingual. That I speak music. I think, rather, that the truth is that music speaks me.

This past year, as it is with every year, there are songs that fill the spaces in my mind and my heart. Songs that I hear God's voice in; songs that draw my voice from me.

And so, my year, in song... These words have been my anthem, and seeing them on paper, they seem to follow a theme.

de janvier à décembre

[Have I mentioned before that I love French? Because I do. I love French.]

[From the Inside Out - Hillsong United]
A thousand times I've failed
Still Your mercy remains And should I stumble again
I'm caught in Your grace
In my heart and my soul
Lord I give You control
Consume me from the inside out
And the cry of my heart
Is to bring You praise
From the inside out
Lord my soul cries out


[Shadowfeet - Brooke Fraser]
Walking, stumbling on these shadowfeet
Toward home, a land that I've never seen
I am changing
Less and less asleep
Made of different stuff than when I began


[You're Gonna Miss This - Trace Adkins]
Five years later there's a plumber workin' on the water heater
Dog's barkin', phone's ringin'
One kid's cryin', one kid's screamin'
And she keeps apologizin'
He says "They don't bother me.
I've got 2 babies of my own.
One's 36, one's 23.
Huh, it's hard to believe, but...

You're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this


[Awakening - Switchfoot]
I want to wake up kicking and screaming
I want to wake up kicking and screaming
I want to know that my heart's still beating,
It's beating, I'm bleeding.
I want to wake up kicking and screaming
I want to live like I know what I'm leaving
I want to know that my heart's still beating,
Is beating, Is beating, It's beating, I'm bleeding


[Desire - Phil Wickham]
I’m running through the gates of love, as fast as I can
I can’t wait to see You 'cause I’m a desperate man
You made the light and sent it down
to show us who You are
Now it’s bursting out my heart
My desire is burning like a million stars
And I’ll keep reaching out, reaching out for You


[The Cut - Jason Gray]
My heart is laid
Under Your blade
As you carve out Your image in me
You cut to the core
But still you want more
As you carefully, tenderly ravage me
Mingling here
Your blood and my tears
As You whittle my kingdom away
But I see that you suffer, too
In making me new
For the blade of Love, it cuts both ways

And You peel back the bark
And tear me apart
To get to the heart
Of what matters most
I’m cold and I’m scared
As your love lays me bare
But in the shaping of my soul
They say the cut makes me whole

Hidden inside the grain
Beneath the pride and pain
Is the shape of the man
You meant me to be
Who with every cut now you try to set free
Come now, set me free


I'd like to see some more of this theme this year.

Less rules.
Less ceremony.
Less and less asleep.

More grace.
More desperation.
More whittling away of my kingdom.
More freedom.
More of the shape of the one I'm meant to be.



7 people love me:

Chel's Leaving a Legacy said...

Well, I can say after two years of French in high school, I can almost read your title.

:-)

I love French, too. And Italian. You know, minus the whole Moffia thing.

I love Hillsong.

The Trace Adkins song goes right along with where my head and heart are right now.

And I haven't heard it yet, but I'm about to listen to that Jason Gray song. Wow. Powerful imagery in the lyrics.

I'd say you had a good year.

Anonymous said...

You have really spoken to me in these last 2 posts.

Down with legalism! :)

Thanks for sharing, and I look forward to seeing what 09 brings for you.

Sarah@Life in the Parsonage said...

I speak music too, I just never knew it till you said it that way! :)

Happy New Year friend!

Anonymous said...

Ah- your words grabbed me from the first sentence. I have said these words many times: "I'm bilingual; music is my first language."
Haven't been here in awhile but from reading your last few posts I'm hooked. I know exactly what you're talking about.

Mama to da Drama said...

Thanks, Jo....for opening up the floodgates. After spending the entire day yesterday cleaning up vomit and barely sleeping at all last night b/c I was afraid my baby would choke in her sleep on her vomit, I listen to Trace Adkins' song (which I've never heard before). I miss country music! Thank you! I needed a good cry. :)

Jackie said...

Sister, I speak music too, and I love how these lyrics all flow together. "You're gonna miss this" gets me every time. And I think we can all use an extra dose of grace - I know I've needed it recently.

Happy New Year, sweet Jodie!

bren j. said...

I haven't listened to that Switchfoot CD in a while. Maybe I'll pull it out later.

And all this French? While I'm no big fan of French (too many bad school experiences), it does make me feel all fancy and foreign when I'm reading your blog. :)