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I really do not know that anything has ever been more exciting than diagramming sentences. Gertrude Stein

10 July 2008

My, don't you look lovely today! (See? I'm already being nicer.)

It's been a while since I last mentioned ballet. The class that was being offered at the gym is now on hiatus. Until possibly September.

It's like they don't even have a conscience. To get people all amped up on something and then take it away. That only creates problems.

I've been all destitute and everything without it. In the meantime, I've done a little research. (You know, I googled some stuff.)

I started by looking up "how to improve balance". Because like I've said before, I wobble. Stop laughing. It's very pretty. I found a good article though, and learned some stuff. The more I read about ballet, the more my confidence grew. Seems that even if you weren't "born a natural", you could still develop greatness. I like that. It lifts my heart again.

Also. Did you know that there is information available to all the people about this: How to Act Like a Ballet Dancer? That particular article was possibly the most insightful.

Here are the highlights. For me anyway.

And I quote:
This article should, maybe, be called:"How to Seem Like A Ballet Dancer".
[[I didn't bother correcting the typos. (Even though I want to real bad.)
(Yes, I know that's not grammatically correct.) I left it in its original form so as not to take away from the author's um, realness.]]
  1. Wear your hair in a bun or ponytail all lot.
  2. Try to act more mature and gracefull.
  3. Be nice.
  4. Wear nice shades of makeup, whatever matches your outfit.
  5. Try to develop a nice, tinkling laugh.
  6. Maybe buy some nice-smelling perfume.
  7. Give people clear, interesting gazes.
  8. Act more bewildered/confused/upset/happy about something. Well, just act more emotional in general.
  9. Get a cat.
  10. Grow flowers.
Grow flowers?
A nice, tinkling laugh? (I have more of a guffaw/cackle. It's loud and low-class.)

(Learned it in Finishing School.)

Clear, interesting gazes? Oh. You mean like this?

Wow. Ballet is painful to learn.

4 people love me:

Jackie @ Our Moments Our Memories said...

What the heck!! This is the best (and weirdest) thing I've read in awhile. Who knew that just acting more emotional in general would fool people into thinking you are a ballet dancer? I'm pretty sure that's not what my husband is thinking when I get all emotional on him.

Just get a cat and grow some flowers, Jodie, and you'll have it made.

bren j. said...

We just bought three plants and one of them is thisclose to being dead.

I think I'm one of the LAST people anyone would suspect of being a ballerina - or "balleter" as I heard last night.

Jodie said...

Jackie: If I have to get a cat and grow flowers, I may as well hang it up right now. Flowers wilt and die under my care, and cats make me itchy and watery. I'm better off working on my tinkling laugh, and my clear, interesting gazes. :)

Bren: Balleter? Where'd you find that person? Sounds like you found "a diamond in the rust"!

Sarah@Life in the Parsonage said...

HA! I love that you laugh is "loud and low-class" Crack me up!...I think mine is too...