Yesterday I went to Target. Alone. It was so nice. I stayed for two hours, looking at clothes, jewelry, shoes and purses. Even now, just thinking about it makes me giddy with excitement. And tomorrow, I get to do it again! My sweet, awesome friend, Jess, is gonna keep my kids all day!! Did I mention she's AWESOME?! I am very, very blessed, and I can't wait.
While I was there I found these cute, cute shoes, which I purchased. They look way cuter in person.
I saw a few other cute things that I brought into the dressing room to try on, one of which was a blue knit skirt. So I put it on and it was so, so comfortable, but not very forgiving, if you know what I mean. I was in one of the big dressing rooms with the three-way mirrors which is both a blessing and a curse. So I'm checking out my back acres, trying to see if this is really workin' for me. It wasn't. But what's worse, I saw something else - this thing on my left calf.
When did this happen?? How??? I'm 28 years old. TWENTY-EIGHT! Not sixty-eight. Y'all. I have a granny vein. The horror! *looking into my crystal ball* I now see some laser surgery in my future. This thing was blue (like the skirt, which I think brought out the color of my GRANNY VEIN nicely) and it was raised. That's the part that horrifies me the most. It looked bumpy. (I can hear you right now, saying "gross" out loud. Or maybe that's just me.) If I wear flats for the rest of my days it will probably never pump up like that (you know, like after you work out your muscles real good, which is usually a desirable thing), but come on, let's don't be silly. What good are flats for the aesthetic appeal of my calves?? Which is only to say that without some kind of a heel, my calves are shapeless and without pump, which is to me, nearly as ugly as that vein. Ugh. So heels it is, vein or no vein.
What is happening to me?! Can I expect to be covered in skin tags by the end of the week? Should I start taking a fiber supplement? I'm too young to die!
I really do not know that anything has ever been more exciting than diagramming sentences. —Gertrude Stein