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I really do not know that anything has ever been more exciting than diagramming sentences. Gertrude Stein

14 June 2010

Cat-Like Reflexes, I Have Not -and- It Can Always Be Worse

I went to church this morning to drop the kids off at day camp.  To get to our final destination-o-fun though, we had to complete a maze. 

From this room up those stairs into that room then the next room then down those stairs on through the next room into this pitch black backstage alleyway, and finally onto the main stage.   Getting my bearings straight and my eyes readjusted to the lighting, I stepped down onto the steps leading down to the main floor and ---  That wasn't the steps!!! 

o
h

c
r
a
p

is what I said!
I twisted my ankle and brush-burned my knee. 

From a medical standpoint, 
I think it's either bruised or sprained or both,
whichever one garners me the most sympathy.  

The auditorium was packed to the brim with people: grown folk and chi'ren folk.  Thankfully the Children's Pastor came out just then and started amping the kids up about camp, causing a welcome distraction from the lady on the floor.  Truly though, I was in so much pain I had little room left for embarrassment.

People rushed to my aid and gave me ibuprofen and ice, then I went off and licked my wounds.

The only thing that could've made things worse is if I'd been wearing a skirt (because that did cross my mind as an outfit possibility this morning).  That and if I'd knocked out some teeth.

Half-naked fashion + toothless.

Like a redneck family reunion.  Yeah, that's definitely worse.

6 people love me:

beautiful disaster said...

Oh, Jodie! You had a very exciting day! I'm so glad that you retained all of your teeth and that you didn't flash anyone. Otherwise, this wouldn't have been all that funny.

And that thing you did with "oh crap"... typing it to resemble your falling... it has a name, but it's been oh so long since high school english classes...

myletterstoemily said...

not a great way to start the day. it
wasn't very nice of your church to
sabotage you like that. :)

i'm so sorry about the sprain. those
are incredibly painful.

guess you better read a very long
book and hire lots of baby sitters.

{Jodie} said...

beautiful disaster: Your brain is more alive than mine, because I can't even remember there being such a thing as the English thing you referenced. But does it count that I was at least bright enough to use it in context?

Lea: Sabotage. That made me laugh. :) You clever little thing, you.

Chel's Leaving a Legacy said...

You SO make me laugh...only I'm not laughing AT you, I'm only laughing WITH you.

You're laughing now, right?

Awwwww...the situation isn't funny; it's only your re-telling it that is. That's whatcha call a "good writer." :-)

Hope you're feeling better soon!

{Jodie} said...

Chel: I'm better now. Thank you for your concern. ;)
I'm just pickin'. I am much better now. Still a little swollen and stiff but very little pain so that's nice. My walking pace is slower and it's given me more of a swagger, which goes well with my minivan. Maybe now I should just wear my pants down real low so it all looks more natural.

Mama to da Drama said...

Jodie...you are so funny. I'm so sorry for your debacle, but I'm glad you're okay because we need you on the girls getaway this weekend. And maybe your swagger will help us out. nobody will mess with us! they'll be like..."dat girl right 'der don't play!"