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I really do not know that anything has ever been more exciting than diagramming sentences. Gertrude Stein

19 June 2009

Lead the way and we'll precede.

I've not forgotten to tell you all about the interview that took place this morning. I am prepared to do just that. Well, semi-prepared, which is why this is going up instead... interview + pictures + links to listen will be up later!

My heart has a deep affection for people who butcher well-known clich├ęs. Well, not so much the people, per se, but for their mangled malapropisms.

Years ago, I had a friend named Jeannie, who was hysterical all the time and I adored her. I wish I still knew her. She was truly one in a million, a diamond in the rust.

Once upon a time, Jeannie was married to a guy by the name of Mouse, who was constantly misquoting things. So much so that she wanted to write a book full of them and call it, Straight From the Mouse's Mouth. She's a genius, you say? I concur.

And now I'd like to share some of my favorite verbal blunders with you (some Mouse's, but mostly not because sadly, I cannot remember them):
  • She is a real catch! A diamond in the rust. [rough]
  • Here Dad, would you like to cut the eucalyptus cord? [umbilical] {This would be one of Mouse's gems - the only one I can recall.}
  • Oh! It gives me the hydrostatics to such a degree! [hysterics]
  • Why, murder's the matter! Slaughter's the matter! Killing's the matter! --but he can tell you the perpendiculars. [particulars]
  • He had to use a fire distinguisher. [extinguisher]
  • Be sure and put some of those neutrons on my salad. [croutons]
  • My new coat has lots of installation. [insulation]
  • He's a wolf in cheap clothing. [sheep's]
  • We have just ended our physical year. [fiscal]
  • What are you incinerating? [insinuating]
Have you heard any good ones? Do tell!! And please, use one today while you're out and about. Just for the fun of it!

4 people love me:

"Rachel" said...

So funny!

I don't have any good ones because I'm usually the one messing them up and have to be told the right word, which I promptly forget. :)

Tante D's better half said...

Jo, I can't wait to hear your interview.

I got two for you.

Just the other day, Doug asked me "Doesn't the embryonic fluid get filtered out?" (amniotic fluid)

Several years ago, my good friend told me that she was having someone come to paint a "muriel" on the wall of her baby's nursery.

btw, I'm so glad you were just kidding around with the "diamond in the rust" thing, b/c that was driving me crazy. I was debating on whether I was going to tell you something...hahahaha

Anonymous said...

You forgot about... You want credic or debit?

Lyn said...

someone once said this while practising his wedding vows:

I, {his name here}, take you, {her name here}, to be my awfully wedded wife...

and even after i corrected him, he thought i was the one who didn't know how the vow should go...lol