The Sky is Only Dark Between the Stars

Just repeat after me: Who's-yer-Daddy

2011-03-02T22:19:00.001-06:00

I made this velvety dream of a pie last Memorial Day weekend.

They call it Hoosier Sugar Cream Pie. I call it Who's-yer-Daddy Pie.

It tastes like a pie made of creme bruleé. Really, do you need any more enticement than that?

Ingredients

2 cups heavy cream
1/2 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 cup brown sugar
1/2 cup granulated sugar
3 tablespoon(s) granulated sugar, for sprinkling
1/2 cup whole milk
1 tsp vanilla extract
1 (9-inch) store-bought piecrust
1 Tbsp unsalted butter
1 tsp ground cinnamon

Directions

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.
For filling: In a medium bowl, combine heavy cream, flour, brown sugar, 1/2 cup granulated sugar, milk, and vanilla.
Fit crust into a 9-inch pie pan and dot bottom with butter. Pour filling into crust. Combine cinnamon and remaining 3 tablespoons sugar and sprinkle on top. Bake pie until set and center is firm to touch, about 1 hour. Cool on a wire rack.

I May Benefit From Some Counseling

2010-08-02T12:03:00.001-05:00

So I've noticed only a few of you have come to my new casa and are following me there. Come on, it's nice there. It smells good.

You know pretty soon, I'm gonna start thinking it's 'cause you hate me.

It's not 'cause you hate me, is it?

Come on, don't leave. I'll do better. I promise I'll change. Give me another chance! This time it's gonna be different. You'll see.

In most cases that's a pack of lies, but not this time. Pinky swear. So come, follow me.

Desperately Seeking Social Affections (and maybe some cheap therapy),
xo, Jodie

Denouement and The Alpha

2010-07-24T08:10:00.091-05:00

As it concerns this blog, I've done some thinking and I've decided on some things.

-1- The name feels long and exhausting to me. I want something short. One word. So I'm pulling an Adele August. Who knows? Maybe before long I'll get a really good deal on a sweet, gold Bimmer and all of my problems will be solved by going for ice cream.

It could happen.

sidenote:

[I always thought it was Beamer,

but I was wrong. I got taken to school.]

- 2 - This is my last post here. I'll be spending the week sprucing up my new crash pad, and that's where I will be hereafter. There's alot I like about this place and at first I was hesitant to start over, but I think that a fresh start is what's best for me now.

- 3 - I'm starting a new feature over yonder. Calling it The Sunday Six... where every Sunday, I list 6 things I love (complete with links, in case you fall in love too and must have these things for your own self!) I know you just can't wait so guess what?! Today being Sunday...

I won't make you!

May I now introduce to you,

The Sunday Six: The Alpha.

[and the crowd goes willlllldddd!]

one, two, three and four
[tell me that you love me more]

This outfit: a perfect marriage of cuteness and comfort.
I'd prefer a red print cardigan. Only I couldn't find one I really loved. So the gray one is a good stand-in. I like it alawt.

cardigan

top

jeans

shoes

five
Because that outfit was begging me for something red:
I give you this little pretty.

six

This boy, whose birthday is today.

Happy Birthday you precious boy!

I love you more than a thousand baby bunnies.

And that's all she wrote!
See you all at my new casa, lovelies! xo, Jodie

My New Favorite Condiment

2010-07-13T17:29:00.002-05:00

I was born a mayonnaise girl.

sidenote:

[Any time I say 'I was born...',

I think of The Jerk, and Steve Martin saying,

"I was born a poor, black man."]

No burger or sandwich-type-thing is even worth the trouble without it in my estimation. Wellllll, I recently decided to go vegan. Regular mayo is a no-no on the vegan train, so what was I to do? Would I really have to be without my beloved? Nobody likes a sad ending.

I didn't have high hopes of finding a replacement as I've tried other types of NON-mayo before and unless you like yours to look and taste like watery, soupy white filth, well then. Insufferable.

Until.

Enter Vegenaise! [cue super-hero noise] I don't know quite how to pronounce it but who cares! It makes me happy!

It also makes me want to eat cucumber sandwiches all day long!

I'm not sure why I'm telling y'all this except that it is great news and great news must be spread.

Much the same as Vegenaise. [du du doosh]

The End and Amen.

A mother sees mischief. A grandmother, genius.

2010-07-06T11:55:00.002-05:00

There are lots of words I could use to describe my third child to you. I could give you a lengthy list of adjectives: boring to read, but the antithesis of boring to live with.

Instead, I give you this:

Once upon a time, a small boy, only two,
wanted to do something really badly,
as small boys of two are apt to do,
but his mother disallowed it.
Undeterred, the small boy
went into the kitchen
and spilled a cup of juice.
As his mother knelt to clean it,
he smiled and ran off
to the very thing she had made
unmistakably clear he could not do.

His grandmother's love this story.

Fakebook Update : A Tall Order

2010-07-02T22:21:00.001-05:00

My status:

Jodie needs a good red lipstick, please? Taking suggestions. I know you're all beauty mavens, so help a sista out.

Also, it would help if you were brunette with blue eyes and an olive complexion.

Also also, let it not be $20 lest I go without glamour forever.

Amen.

A Medley of Announcements

2010-06-29T13:06:00.003-05:00

When I see the word medley

I think of cafeteria food.

If this post that I'm offering up today were a school lunch,

this is what would be on the MENU
[which I used to think was pronounced me-new...
being a WordGirl is something
that has developed over time].

Salsbury Steak

The flava has returned to my mouth! Ha-lay-lou-juh. [pronounced with a J sound, not a Y, cause it's funner to say that way.] [No, funner is not a word, but funner is funner to say than more fun.]

Mashed Potatoes & Gravy

My foot is still bothering me. It hurts across the top, where all the lil' bones are. I find that it feels better when I tippy toe than when I'm flat footed. What does that mean, do ya think?

Dinner Roll

I've been listening to 100 Portraits again for the first time in years. About 9 of them. Years, that is. It is so good that I rarely want to hear anything else. Do you get fixated on music that way, too? I am fixated, except for right this instant, because I'm listening to Pandora and they do not have a 100 Portraits station. What is this world coming to is what I have to say about that.

Vegetable Medley

(corn, peas and green beans)

For a long time when I'd ask if he wanted to potty on the big potty Puddin' would say, "No, I tiny baby." He is now starting to use the potty and is pretty proud of himself. [Part of the excitement is getting to "thlush" when he's all done.]

Also, how can the summer be enjoyed when it's too hot to even walk outside? Right now it's breezy out there which amounts to this: It was already hot as HECK, but then someone went and turned on a fan heater. Sitting out there makes you wish you had an internal sprinkler system installed.

Lastly,
I just heard this line:

Oh LORD, God of our fathers
this day let it be known
That you Lord, are God of the present tense.

I love that.

That's it for today.

I hope you enjoyed your meal.
Come Again!

Fakebook Update

2010-06-24T15:37:00.000-05:00

There is no joy to be found

in eating when you can't taste anything.

What will bring back my ability to taste?

Benadryl?

Zyrtec?

Nope.

Neither.

Got any suggestions?

I'm eating at P.F. Chang's tomorrow

and it would be enormously sad

if I couldn't taste my lettuce wraps.

How do I fix this problem STAT?

Fakebook

2010-06-21T15:15:00.001-05:00

Hello, Lovelies! Today I want to talk about Facebook, and how I really miss Facebook sometimes. Like really really. Occasionally I just feel like I want to post a status update, so what I've decided I'll do is to just post them here as I feel the itch.

Like now, for instance.

And from now on, I'll just be calling these my Fakebook Status Updates. Here goes.

Title: A Desperate Situation

(Oh yeah, and I might post Titles to my Updates

((like the title of a poem)),

especially when I'm feeling extra fancy.)

PETA PETA Punkin' Eata
is so concerned about the conditions of the wildlife in the Gulf
because the situation is so unfortunate.

They should see the fish at Wal-Mart.

Feel free to Like and Comment at will.

Thanking you in advance.

Changing the Face of the Barnyard, Pixar is.

2010-06-17T13:25:00.002-05:00

There are myriad reasons why Puddin' could have easily been nicknamed The Cuteness.

myriad (mr-d):
Constituting a very large, indefinite number; innumerable

Let me exampilate:

Puddin': Mama, duck shay?

Mama: Quack Quack

Puddin': Uhhhhh, cow shay?

Mama: Moooooooo!

Puddin': Horse shay?

Mama: (I can't spell that one

but you just gon' hafta believe me,

I do a pretty good horse sound.)

Oh! I have one! What does a donkey say?

Puddin': Get out o' me swamp!

Cat-Like Reflexes, I Have Not -and- It Can Always Be Worse

2010-06-14T13:45:00.001-05:00

I went to church this morning to drop the kids off at day camp. To get to our final destination-o-fun though, we had to complete a maze.

From this room up those stairs into that room then the next room then down those stairs on through the next room into this pitch black backstage alleyway, and finally onto the main stage. Getting my bearings straight and my eyes readjusted to the lighting, I stepped down onto the steps leading down to the main floor and --- That wasn't the steps!!!

o
h

c
r
a
p

is what I said!

I twisted my ankle and brush-burned my knee.

From a medical standpoint,

I think it's either bruised or sprained or both,

whichever one garners me the most sympathy.

The auditorium was packed to the brim with people: grown folk and chi'ren folk. Thankfully the Children's Pastor came out just then and started amping the kids up about camp, causing a welcome distraction from the lady on the floor. Truly though, I was in so much pain I had little room left for embarrassment.

People rushed to my aid and gave me ibuprofen and ice, then I went off and licked my wounds.

The only thing that could've made things worse is if I'd been wearing a skirt (because that did cross my mind as an outfit possibility this morning). That and if I'd knocked out some teeth.

Half-naked fashion + toothless.

Like a redneck family reunion. Yeah, that's definitely worse.

The Night I Made It to the Big Time

2010-06-11T08:30:00.003-05:00

So last night I was at Barnes & Noble but I wasn't buying a new journal as you might suspect, which is what normally brings me there. I was building my fame.

By the way,
Why do people have so much trouble

pronouncing Barnes & Noble?

Barnes & Nobles? Barne & Noble?

People are all confused about the crooked letter.

Throws 'em off. In the

mispronunciation department,

it's up there with Wal-Mart. Think about it.

I was invited to a New Authors Book Signing Night-O-Fame Celebratory Convention (key words: book signing and fame) and I think it is an understood thing in all cultures that when Barnes and Noble calls, you go! There were 8 authors invited altogether. One of the local news channels (Channel 3/KATC - for all my local yocals - whatup Marcelle Fontenot?! Call me! Actually, don't call me. You'll just make me nervous.) came out to cover it and I had a cameo appearance on the 10 o'clock news last night! It's like I'm famous now.

I was the one over the shoulder of the guy they were interviewing...but clearly it was ME they were showcasing. He was just a decoy.

Obviously.

I only sold (1), BUT I had a good time and also, I felt pretty 'cause I had gotten all gussied up and I smelled really good, so all was not lost. (When somebody smells the perfume or cologne, we like to say they "smell the ha-na-na".)

Plus, I was on the news and I was invited to a book signing AT BARNES & NOBLE! And I was on the news.

So I think that means I made it to the Big Time.

Public Service Announcement:

To order my book online, and thereby increase my growing fame (yes please!), click here or here, please and thank you! Exclamation point!

And now I know what herpetology means.

2010-05-13T20:26:00.001-05:00

We recently acquired a pet, and by "we" I mean "they". But mostly him... my sweet 7 year old who loves reptiles (and who is also losing teeth faster than I can count. Makes me squeamish at all the wigglyness and also swoonish at all the cuteness).

Anyway, a green anole [uh-noh-lee] is what we got (although it is sometimes brown, so I don't know why it's called "green"). Until I consulted Mr. The Google, I just thought it's proper name was yard lizard. Because that's where I caught it. In the yard.

It lives outside in the wild. Well, outside in an aquarium-like "reptilian habitat" filled with black and white rocks and also plastic plants, so it's like the wild... only with less danger. And more plastic leaves.

So, paradise, basically.

Here's the thing though. It won't let us watch it eat. What do you think of that? We pour in crickets, we wait. Nothing. Here's how I imagined it though. Lizard + Crickets = instant Animal Planet Hunting Showdown Extravaganza. A veritable feeding frenzy!

So far though, the young lad (lass?) ain't down with that. It likes to eat alone, all private like, which is okay because I can respect a thing's privacy, but I only wish it weren't so shy. I like to observe the science. Like shedding, and devouring crickets. *eyebrow raise* Yummy.

The Lunatic Squirrel Meets Jesus

2010-03-26T16:49:00.005-05:00

I never leave home without a notebook. Just in case. I have hundreds upon hundreds of links bookmarked on my computer so that I have them if I should ever need them. I do occasionally go back and use those ideas but the ones that I don't are legion. Yet I keep collecting. The fear of needing them nips at my heels.

Don't stop or it's going to get you.

Like a [deranged] squirrel, I gather. I'm a constant gatherer. If life were a big tabletop, I'd lean over as far as I could, spread my arms out wide and sweep as much information as I could grasp, pulling it into my belly, heaping it upon my feet.

And then I'd secretly panic
about what was left on the table,

because what if those things
were the ones I'd really need later on?
It's better to have and not need than need and not have,
the voice reminds me.

Is it though?

In my zeal, I gather gather gather
(MUSTN'T.

STOP.

GATHERING.)

leaving little time for application, little time to enhance the lives around me. How can you stop and apply it when there is more information to be had? What if you miss something important? Then what'll happen to you? Adding to the trouble is that my mind seems to work like a sieve, retaining way less than I can be comfortable with. The stress works against me. The more I depend on myself to not be forgetful, the more forgetful I become.

What is left only makes me panicky about what has left.

How does one relax in such a state? How does one "loosen up" so as not to fret so much about getting more? About getting enough? About getting the right things? And also, what's driving this madness?

FEAR. It's a she-witch.

She whispers lies.

You're in charge of making sure you get it.

You better get it right the first time.

Your mistakes will ruin you... will ruin them.

But not Jesus.

My sure hand is beneath you, just as surely as it is beneath your children.

Don't worry. I know what you need before you even ask.

Take my hand, and I will guide you into all the truth there is.
Great grace is covering you.
Peace, be still.

His sweet words are like a hug, making me free to breathe again, to ease up a bit and to believe the truth that He's working day and night making me into what I ought to be. It's not up to me to find and implement the exact equation of information to ensure that I am who and where I need to be... All I have to do is to believe the love, because I'm already accepted in the beloved. I don't have to fix myself. And that's exactly the thing the heart of this lunatic squirrel needs to be storing away.

meanwhile + a guessification and also some announcements

2010-03-22T08:42:00.002-05:00

This song is sort of what's keeping me away for so long.

If I were to prognosticate, (which I am), I'd say I'll be back somewhere in the space of the next 8 to 10 weeks or so. Just speculation though; a feeling in the bones. (Which may or may not mean anything.)

Oh, and a few announcements:

+ I'm no longer on Facebook. I deactivated this week... I've felt for a long while now that I needed to lay that down but tried other methods instead, like cutting back, because I can quit anytime I want, gosh! Except that I couldn't, in fact, and kept being sucked back in within a matter of days, so I decided to drop it like it's hot. In ya face, Facebook!

+ The other thing is this:

A while back I changed Post a Comment to People Love Me and I've come to regret that word choice - only now I've gone and disremembered how I did it so I have no way of going back and undoing it.

My search, thus far, has been feckless so maybe I will one day be so fortunate as to find how I got myself into this pickle in the first place and correctify my actions.

Anyyyray...

Everything rides on hope now.

Coup de Grace

2009-09-26T13:37:00.003-05:00

coup de grace ("blow of mercy") means
a death blow to end the suffering of a wounded creature.

Act 3, Final Scene

Five.

That's how many drafts I have waiting to post. Revised, edited, rewritten over and over. Every time I go back they become more and more dull and lifeless. My postings, more and more sporadic. It is a sign.

I keep coming back to this place. Beating the horse, "Hey dude, is there life left in you? Are you gonna get up? Are you sure you're dead? Cause I think ya got a few more miles in ya." Ugh. "Don't be dead. Come on!", and then I kick it, because I want it to live.

How many times have I circled this mountain? Once? Twice? Now again?

I feel like such a flake. Do I have no stick-to-it-ive-ness? For once, I'd like to just make a decision and stay with it. But I'm so weak. Y'all say things to me like, "I'm gonna miss you", and "I miss your blog", and "You're so awesome it's stupefying!" Well, not so much that last one but I would totally be okay with it... What I'm saying to you is my co-dependence on your comments disables me.

Plainly, it's your fault.

Oh! But I've been so bored with my own writing lately I want to chew off my own arm and throw it into an abyss of death the next time I see one.

Every time I've done this (quit... not chew off my arm), it has been with good reason. Very good, legitimate reason (like responsible time management), (although the chewing can be easily justified, too) and still I find my way back. Maybe it's like peeling an onion? One layer at a time... God knows that to rip it away all at once would be too grievous for me, His tender little onion blossom.

Dang it though! I'm gonna miss it here... even though I've been so utterly lame lately. So lame it bruises me and crushes my very soul. Every time I look through my old posts, I wonder, what has happened to me? I used to be better at this! Is this God's way of causing me to let it go? This gradual dulling of my mind, my posts increasingly tedious -- increasingly boring.

Unsuitable.

Flat.

Whether or not that's by Design, I can't say, but it does make walking away more easily done, even if only slightly more easily done. Disobedience to this inner leading though could only mean more of the same lame that deteriorates into more and more lame. Who wants to continue that kind of legacy? And besides, my ego can't take that.

I'll tell you what this is about. God is totally gunning for me. He is trying to kill me. It's true. I'm not making that up and it's not a Conspiracy Theory. (See for yourself: Jn 12:24) I never want to sacrifice blogging. This is the thing I hold to with the most tenacity. I WANT TO KEEP THIS THING!

I can't say for certain why I feel God leading me here. I can't articulate the reason except to say I feel it has something to do with death to self, and also faithfulness to follow through with what I hear God saying to me in this moment, whether I "get it" or not. (See Rom 12:1-2)

I'm trying to think of some spiritually awesome analogy for y'all, to paint you a beautiful word picture, but all my brain will give me is this:

My acorn of a blog is entering the Fall
and then after that, the Winter,
where it will go down, down, down into the dark soil,
buried for a little while in the quiet darkness,
seen only by God and the worms.
There, God will do things to it and maybe one day
it will grow into a beautiful oak tree (down) by the river.

I'll wait while you get your tissues 'cause that was moving, right there. I just know it blessed your heart.

I hope that while I'm gone, y'all don't write anything awesome. If you do, email me the link okay, because I don't want to be the last to know. That would be like the Three Amigos... when one (that would be me) goes off to the bathroom and the others (the rest of you) have a secret meeting without him (me).

(If you're liking that little bit of genius Three Amigos prose right there, well, watch The Office more often and you can hear gems like that from Michael Scott, the little buttercup himself; and then you can gank them from him like I did just there.)

So I guess this is my swan song, my coup de grace, until God releases me and I can write something that isn't loathsome trash. Hopefully that release will come relatively soon. Meantime, y'all promise to miss me okay?, and email me some time. I like the social aspect of the internet very much. Y'all are my friends, and I miss you already. (PS -- You don't have to say you're proud of me. Just pray for me, because this is really hard.)

(heavy sigh)

Exit Stage Left

Curtains

I bet I could eat all those doughnuts in one sitting and other random thoughts.

2009-09-23T08:16:00.006-05:00

1. Please share one middle school memory. It can be good, bad, ugly, funny. Pictures or words, I don't care, just share.
Middle School... that would be 7th and 8th Grade? Those were the worst of all my school years. Those were the years I was in serious emotional trouble; a danger to myself. I hated my life in every way.

I spent several class periods in the Guidance Counselor's Office, dodging PE and also, brooding and sulking.
I obsessed over, pined after and lost my identity in a thug (who I thought was so fine!) who had no interest in me. That's the year I learned the meaning of the word "unrequited" and also "infatuation".
I wasn't good at putting on make-up (but still snuck the little bit I'd gotten from my mom or stolen from Wal-Mart into my backpack so I could apply it at school since I wasn't yet allowed to wear it.)

I was in trouble, y'all.

I know that's a heavy starter but it was that, or you know, lie.

2. What's your favorite Beatles song?

I like the Beatles.
Especially,
I'm Looking Through You
When I'm 64
Ob-la-di, Ob-la-da

3. If I asked you to describe your most comfortable outfit, what would it be?

Pajama pants and a baggy t-shirt, but I'm not sure that qualifies as a real "outfit", as in "something I might wear on an outing". If that's what "outfit" means, then I vote for my black knit dress. It's as comfortable as my first choice, only better looking.

4. Would you rather host a party or be a guest?

I enjoy a little of both.

5. Do you think we will move completely from traditional books to digital ones, and if we do, are you OK with that?

I should dearly hope not. Digital books do nothing for me. What pleasure is there in reading a book you cannot feel or smell?

6. Do you learn best by reading, listening or experiencing?

I'm tactile. I learn best by touching. I enjoy the other two, but doing something myself is the best way for me to actually remember what I'm learning.

7. If you are (or when you were) single, what is the kiss of death for you concerning the opposite sex? (That is, what is one trait or behavior or habit or anything at all that immediately turns you off from considering that person a potential match for you?)
All of these criteria rose up after I got sober. Before that, let's just say I was less demanding.

A. Violently sucking food out of his teeth
B. Wearing socks with sandals or super-reflective lens sunglasses
C. Acted needy or clingy or seeming desperate in any way
D. Smelling like an ashtray or taking the pot
E. Having snaggleteeth or halitosis

I would date: None of the above.

8. Snacks. Salty or sweet?

I'm weak. I fall for both.

9. Look around you in a four foot radius. What object is around you that you didn't realize was there or forgot was there? How long has it been there?

A bunch of cassette tapes. They've been there for 6 years--as long as we've been in this house. They've been in my possession for years and years though. I keep them because ~~I'm a packrat~~ they provide me with some much-appreciated nostalgia ~~and dust~~.

10. What is your favorite Tom Cruise movie?

I'm not a fan.

Now Tom Hanks? That's a horse of a different color.

11. You buy a bottle of shampoo and discover that you don't like what it does to your hair at all. What do you do with that full bottle?

Glare at it and scold it for being a selfish and unfeeling waste of my money.

Then I give it away because maybe someone else can benefit from my misstep.

12. Your favorite Fall comfort food?

Warm pie, the orange kind.
You know the ones....The usual suspects. Sweet Potato and Pumpkin.

(leaning in to whisper) Although truth be told, I cannot tell the difference.

Can you?
There's more where this came from. Go to Lid's place to partake.

Happiness is...

2009-09-12T11:50:00.006-05:00

Something I recognize in myself is that I find it disturbingly easy to complain about things. I find myself far too easily slanted in that direction, but today I'm thinking happy thoughts about happy things. This is by no means extensive, only a small conglomeration of things that make me supremely and incandescently happy.

WORDS sunshine real whipped cream rainy nights embroidery hoops ribbon velvet simple but unusual jewelry
wire baskets {especially chicken wire}
t-strap mary janes good jeans sweater coats
my first cup of coffee bluebirds springtime {le printemps}
french thrift stores fabric notecards
NESTS shipping tags kraft paper bags COLOR {{glitter}}
baby's breath
{the real deal and the flowers, but especially the real deal}
bunnies the smell of newborn babies
[twig pencils] crafting running outdoors with my iPod
used book sales {Pride & Prejudice}
air mail {par avion}
handwritten notes solitude REAL FRIENDS crowns hobby stores
|red & white stripes| Christmas
my family's belly laughs children's art a good deal snow
finishing a project Mad Libs diagramming sentences
finding the perfect purse
books that make me feel I should read with a British accent
{believing God} well timed jokes
a perfectly situated tree alongside a bubbling brook
cottage gardens
{family togetherness}

What about you?

A Case for Bacon -or- My New Favorite Health Foods

2009-09-11T15:23:00.007-05:00

This lady may have just ruined my propensity to diet forever ("propensity", because let's be real, I'm not a consistent dieter, even though I try and I sure think about it a bunch. Does that count for something?).

Cheers! To long life and to bacon!

Status Updates

2009-09-11T10:43:00.005-05:00

As you can see, I'm still thinking in status updates. You know what they say about habits--

[Powerful indeed is the empire of habit. (Publilius Syrus said that.)]

Ironically, Publilius was one of the names we considered for our last born.

[Old habits are strong and jealous. (That would be Dorothea Brande.)]

...even Magic Eraser can't help me now. There is more permanent marker on my little one this morning... it'll take a week and miracle to get his arms clean again.

...just realized Grandparent's Day is this weekend - time to start cranking out some sincere handmade cards!

...wishes that when I decide to go on a no-sugar diet, that sugar would suddenly become repulsive to me. Sugar is my unrequited love.

...loves getting new vitamins/supplements in the mail! They make me feel so hopeful.

...just played a little Spelling Bee on The Free Dictionary (nobody's revoking my Nerd Card), and I feel like such a little smarty when I get the expert words right! And then I'm zapped back into reality when I can't even understand the next word's pronunciation. Oh well, I still have the win of my 4th Grade Spelling Bee, where I correctly spelled the impossible word "fraction", and that beautiful trophy of a gold spectacled bee holding a book was in the bag! (I wish I still had it. I would totally rock it as the best bookend ever.)

...is now in favor of human cloning. Two of me has to be better than one. Although... now that I think about it, it's not misery that loves company, but laziness. Two of us would probably do even less than one, so nevermind. Better press on.

Funny is funny because it is TRUE.

2009-09-08T16:55:00.005-05:00

I just got this email from one of my favorite friends ever, Melissa. I'm telling you like I told her, I needed this laugh today, lest I run away from home.

It's been a beautiful day. (Now's when that sarcasm font would be handy-dandy.)

Like I said, this was an email, so you know, completely plagiarized.

(I should know because one day, I "plagiarized" one of my parents' signatures on a Disciplinary Action Report, and then I had to write the Webster's full definition of plagiarism pert-near a thousand times.)(I still hate my parents for that one.)

(The actual amount is a bit cloudy, but I still have a pencil groove in my ring finger on my right hand to prove it was a whole HECK of A-Bunch.)

(There went my hand modeling career, like a fart in the wind.)

Anyway, I hate to put off the laughs, so let's move along, shall we?

-I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.

-More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that's not only better, but also more directly involves me.

-Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

-How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

-I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

-The only time I look forward to a red light is when I’m trying to finish a text.

- Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart", all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart".

-What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each other?

- Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

- I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the shower first and THEN turn on the water.

-I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

- Bad decisions make good stories.

-Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go around and say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly nervous? Like I know my name, I know where I'm from, this shouldn't be a problem....

-You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you've made up your mind that you just aren't doing anything productive for the rest of the day.

-I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.

-I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people watching TV. There's so much pressure. 'I love this show, but will they judge me if I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren't watching this. It's only a matter of time before they all get up and leave the room. Will we still be friends after this?'

- I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

-When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.

-My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would happen if you ran over a ninja?" How do I respond to that?

-It really ticks me off when I want to read a story on CNN.com and the link takes me to a video instead of text.

-The other night I ordered takeout, and when I looked in the bag, saw they had included four sets of plastic silverware. In other words, someone at the restaurant packed my order, took a second to think about it, and then estimated that there must be at least four people eating to require such a large amount of food. Too bad I was eating by myself. There's nothing like being made to feel like a fatso before dinner.

Laughing must really be good for you, because I just laughed a bunch and now, I'm slightly less twitchy and a little more certain that everything is gonna be OH-KIZ-AY.

The silver lining: Where there's smoke, there is NOT fire.

2009-09-04T17:15:00.008-05:00

My house smells atrocious right now.

Atrocious.

I was feeling very domestic earlier and set supper to start on the stove and decided to bake some egg-free sugar cookies for my allergy ridden family to enjoy.

(Actually, only the baby has the egg allergy but earlier in the week, I made chocolate chip cookies that he was denied so I was feeling bad for him.)

Supper was to be bean burritos, but I had to cook the dry beans first. I set them to boil, added some water a bit later as I saw the level dropping and then headed outside and promptly forgot all about it.

Much time passed (probably close to an hour) and my Sweet Pickle asked to come inside for some milk and then came quickly back out the back door exclaiming, "Mama, the house stinks. Why do your beans smell like that?"

"Oh my gosh! The beans!! I forgot all about them!"

There goes supper. It's looking like a great night to eat out.

The house is hazy like a youth function. Fans are on high, windows are thrown open and I keep spraying Oust, only to see it (smell it?) quickly defeated by the ghastly bean odor.

In conclusion,
Today will be "affectionately" remembered as
The Day She Set The House On Smoke.

And also, the day I changed the smoke alarm batteries,
because they have made nary a peep in all this excitation.

What is best for YOU

2009-08-10T19:20:00.006-05:00

While it may not be insidious by nature, with my present circumstances it is most certainly insidious to me.

insidious - awaiting a chance to entrap; harmful but enticing; having a gradual and cumulative effect
syn. treacherous, seductive, subtle

Facebook is the beast of which I speaketh.

I think we can all agree that by nature, Facebook cannot be called a beast.

What I'm talking about here is conviction. Mine. I've been under some heavy stuff since I was recently challenged by this question:

What is the purpose in your pursuits this past week?

These words struck me, too:

Every commitment needs a purpose you can articulate & define.

We must learn to differentiate between distractions & duties.

Well okay then. That certainly clears things up then, doesn't it?

How does Facebook fit into my life? Distraction or duty? Can I articulate the purpose of it for me? Yes. It's a diversion from my duties, which is to say it's a diversion from my family.

For clarity's sake, the only reason I felt any conviction at all is because I know the time I've spent there, "just checking". I've begun to think in terms of status updates. My life is not a series of status updates.

We're homeschooling this year for the first time, and when I consider the purpose behind that, it makes the whole issue of Facebook very clear for me... and nothing grand just happens, I must remind myself.

Self to self talk: Well then ya know what ya gotta do, huh? You gotta drop it like it's hot!

And so that's what I aim to do - because I want to run as to get the prize, not chase multiple pursuits aimlessly.

So, at some point today, Facebook will suddenly drop off my radar.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

When I went to Bible Gateway (which is a great site, by the way) to get the "prize" reference, this is what greeted me at the door:

“This is what the LORD says—
your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel:
"I am the LORD your God, who teaches you what is best for you,
who directs you in the way you should go.”
Isaiah 48:17

Left to myself, I would chase rabbits and shiny things (and Facebook) all day, and then complain at the end of the day (or at the end of my days) that my life is what it is. I know, because I already have that nasty habit.

I am so grateful for the leading of my Redeemer (who redeems me from myself, among other things) because His guidance leads down the roads that lead to the desires of my heart...
family togetherness and a house filled with love...

Unpacking Your (lengthy list of) Adjectives

2009-08-04T14:50:00.007-05:00

This year, being our first year homeschooling, there will be many days that I have to get things done and I will have to learn to brave the rapids (of grocery stores and car rides and such) with all three of my squeamish children and no one else.

This weekend, I got the chance to practice.

But Mama didn't raise no fool. It was the weekend, which meant I might not have to go it alone. I'll practice next time.

I called my sister (Backup! Holla!) to see if she'd like to come along with me (and my three wretched little shoppers) to go do a little shopping. She said she'd be delighted (or something like that). All I heard was yes, and I was golden.

Together, we braved a few fierce stores, and the callousMall, which is no debonair task. Thankfully, one of the stores had an enclosed play area, with a high, resolute wall, in place to discourage climbing out (which almost worked).

SIDENOTE:
I just love it
when a children's store
is set up in a way that
makes room for actual children.
I find it incredibly helpful
and supremely awesome.
Thank you!

We shopped close by and kept our eyes on the kids while they had the most fun shopping in as long as they could remember. (It was also the most fun I've had shopping with kids in as long as I could remember.)

It's not that they're bad shoppers. I mean, they are, but it's because they're just not made for it. Their Mama loves to shop and I have to explore all of my frumpy options before making a decision which makes for deranged and nostalgic shopping trips.

We figured we could tackle that lugubrious beast, the Mall, mostly because we could bribe them with treats, like candy and McDonald's. We went into a shoe store where I had to continuously remind them to stop taking the dashing shoes off of the crispety-crunchety peanut-buttery shelves to ask us if we liked them or thought they were cool. How 'bout asking me if I think my head might explode, because yes, Yes, I think it may!

When it was finally all said and done, we made good on our putrid candy and chicken nugget promises, and partook of a few of the boorish tasties ourselves. French fries can cure almost any ailment, far as I can tell.

In closing, if you elect me President, I promise that all stores will have a high-walled embankment for keeping little ones safe (perhaps from their own mother's who might squish them in an effort to just make them be still for goodness sake). And also, every woman will have a sister to shop with at all times. Amen.

(All adjective offerings have been underlined and linked wherever possible, and do keep in mind that they were chosen at random. Thank ya very muuuuuch!)

May I Have A Word? | Chapter 3

2009-07-29T12:17:00.005-05:00

I've always been a big, big fan of Mad Libs, especially for the element of surprise. It's something that snagged me way back when, in like, middle school, and has never turned me loose. But I don't mind, 'cause I had love them lil' Mad Libs. It's a match made in Heaven. God made me to love language, and then He made somebody else make Mad Libs. And then we met, me and Mad Libs, and I fell in love.

So, as a way to work that sort of fun into my little blogging world, I'd like to present to you the May I Have a Word, Unpack Your Adjectives Edition.

By way of review, in case you're a little foggy,
an adjective modifies a noun, distinguished by one of several suffixes such as -able, -ous, -er, and -est, or by position, directly preceding a noun or nominal phrase.

Here is a short list of possibles:
colossal
lumpy
paltry
unkempt
husky
glistening
thrunchy

In order for this to work like actual, real live Mad Libs, what I'll do is write down your offerings and draw randomly from a bowl and use them when I find myself in need of an adjective... and perhaps, I'll write a little more descriptively, to make more room for more adjectives.

Also, I have not forgotten about your other offerings that have not yet seen the light of a posted post as opposed to a draft --- they will soon surface as well. Do not despair.

So go on now, and Unpack Your Adjectives so I can use them to tell you my tales.
And have a pleasant day!

With age comes oversharing?

2009-07-27T07:27:00.008-05:00

I'd like to talk a little today about some of the particulars of aging, as it pertains to certain ones of the female persuasion.

I think we all know the expression, "With age comes wisdom". How about the slightly less known, "With age comes too much information". Heard of it? Well I propose, even if the expression is unknown to you, the concept is not.

I recently met a lady in passing; let's call her Lucille, shall we? Lucille and I chatted a bit as women do, making small talk. Shortly thereafter, a friend of hers, whom we'll call Pearl, walked up to us and greeted Lucille.

Keep in mind that these ladies were standing within arms reach of me, and I don't have excessively long arms, which means that I can hear them, and they know that I can hear them, and also bear in mind, I am a complete stranger to them both.

Pearl says, "Hey Lu, how ya doin?"

Lucille responds, "Wellll, I have a yeast infection and hemorrhoids so, you know, I should probably be home with my feet propped up instead of in here shopping."

I don't think that's what Pearl was gunning for.

This sort of reply always puts someone (who thinks you're crazy) in the awkward position of having to respond.

Let's keep going though, shall we? How about another example of this most troubling phenomenon?

My friend tells tale of the day a woman left her Grandfather in social difficulties. She describes her Grandfather as a very conservative, and very, very private man. One day, a family member shows up to his home. As he opens the door to her he says, "Hi so and so, How ya doin'?" She throws her hands in the air over her head and says in exasperation and with great energy, "Not too good! I'm bleedin' from the rectum!"

What happens between 17 and say... 50?

At 17, girls are mortified and prepared to drop out of school, and may even write into a magazine that bears their age telling of their most embarrassing moment, if they come out of the bathroom with a tiny piece of toilet paper hitchin' a ride on their shoe. It's too much to bear.

Fast forward a few years to age 50 and beyond, and you will see a loss of restraint that is staggering, where women will say in front of anyone what is going on in the area that was once known as private.

I understand that not every woman suffers from this affliction, but it is rather common. Common enough that you probably have a story yourself. If you don't, I'd bet the farm that you know someone who does.

Risky Business

2009-07-22T17:25:00.005-05:00

My tongue might fall off.

It just might.

This sauce might also burn a hole in my intestines and ruin my liver.

Then again, it might not.

I'll take that chance.

It all started at the sushi restaurant
with the spicy mayo.
Where it stop,
nobody know.

Sugarhead, The Entertainer

2009-07-22T07:40:00.005-05:00

Sugarhead uses half words, which I cannot get my fill of. For instance, she'll say she wants to watch teev, or she wants to go to the lib (long i). That apple didn't fall far from the Let's Talk Ghetto tree.

She also loves long walks on the beach and spends her free time making up words.

My most recent favorite came last night after bath time. Let me illustrate.

"Look, Mama, look! Look at my fingers", she exclaims, spreading her little hands open for investigation. "They're all cruffled."

Cruffled -
to soak, fill, or saturate with water so as to make soggy

synonyms: water logged, prune hands

She doesn't mean to be so entertaining. She just is.

{You can't have her. She's all mine.}

Make a wish

2009-07-14T13:15:00.004-05:00

The dandelion radiantly shining in the grass like a spark dropped from the sun.
Henry Ward Beecher

The miracles of nature do not seem miracles
because they are so common.
If no one had ever seen a flower, even a dandelion
would be the most startling event in the world.

The Lord, our God, He is splendiferous!

Famous Last Words

2009-07-13T08:21:00.008-05:00

Not much changes around here. Whenever people ask what's been going on, the answer is typically, "nothing new".

With the exception of the occasional illness or broken household item, things are pretty consistent.

This week though, I have something new to tell.

Something I've said for the past 6 years that I would never do.

Never.

It would take a miracle of such proportions that it is inconceivable that it would ever happen.

"Never", I said.

And then God chuckled, and He giggled, and He laughed and laughed and laughed.

Because He always knows something I don't; He knows what's coming, and I don't.

Until I do.

Dude.

This year, for the first time ever, I will be homeschooling.

Yeah, let that soak in.

(Y'all. I swore I never would.)

But the times, they are a-changin'. (Sing it, Bob!)

I do not pretend to know the full-extent of God's reasoning behind all of this, but there are a few things I hope to gain from it.

There is one major thing I want for our family, and that is for us to be close-knit... for our children to be in close relationship with each other, and for them to also feel safe, close and open with us, their parents.

These desires have been in my heart, ever present, since I became The Mama.

This whole thing just makes me laugh a little. It's so typical to have things work out in this fashion -- in a way that I get what I want, but it comes in such a manner I'd never have expected!

(Kinda like in the very difficult, early years of our marriage when we had 2 kids right out of the starting blocks (and I thought our ship would sink)... but God knew exactly what He was doing, because those babies kept us together when other things fought with all their might to pull us apart, and may well have succeeded if not for them... it would've been too easy to walk away. Having them turned out to be very good for us.)

The same is true even now. There are other things fighting against me, all the time pulling at me. Developing the closeness and togetherness I want for our family takes so much effort, and so much death to my flesh.

But I want it.

... and nothing grand just happens.

Love, God

2009-07-10T09:14:00.000-05:00

If you want to know how much I love you, count the waves.

Regret

2009-07-09T08:21:00.002-05:00

More often than not, the sentiments I hear on regret go something like this:

"I don't regret anything. Everything I've ever done / been through has taught me a great lesson, and therefore, I have no regrets."

By definition, to regret is
1) to feel sorrow or remorse for an act, fault, etc.
2) to think of with a sense of loss.

When I look back over the course of my life, especially where I was about 10 years ago, I have a strong sense of regret. My heart is heavy with a sense of sorrow and remorse, even now. I hurt people. I did awful things that I knew would cause other people serious pain.

How can I now look at my actions and feel thankful for the "lesson" that was in it for me? That, to me, is even worse than the initial offense, which was grievous. How could I elevate some lesson over the pain I caused to someone else's heart. Who can say what difficulty they've had to endure because of my choices? Is any lesson ever worth that?

I should think not. Emphatically, I say no.

If I had it to do all over again, there are things I would do differently, and that, to me, is the essence of regret. I pray for the people that I hurt, so that their hearts can know healing and true peace... that their hearts can be healed from the pain I put there. Truly, I want it to be taken away and that they will know the love of God that is theirs in Christ Jesus.

And just for clarity's sake because I can already sense the direction of your comments, I am not talking about not being able to forgive myself or even making an effort to make restitution. I am satisfied, on both accounts, and yet, regret still remains.

So don't y'all go worrying ya little heads about me. I'm not sitting here in some depressed stupor. I just had a few thoughts on regret. That's all.

And I'm curious to know, what's your view on it?

Do you think this guy was a Boy Scout?

2009-07-06T13:22:00.000-05:00

Hurricane season is upon us.
Thankfully, there's been nothing brewing to cause alarm.
However, if something does begin to churn out there, I don't think this guy plans to evacuate.
This, my friends, is preparedness... the likes of which I have never seen.
I like to think I've seen alot, but this.... I stand amazed.

You may recognize these pictures from my photo blog, {Verbs & Nouns}.
This is what (this) one does when (this) one is too lazy to post something else.
Besides, you may not know about my other blog, and I think we can all agree, information like this must be shared.

Let the record show, I'm only being redundant in order to better serve the people.

Lead the way and we'll precede.

2009-06-19T09:03:00.005-05:00

I've not forgotten to tell you all about the interview that took place this morning. I am prepared to do just that. Well, semi-prepared, which is why this is going up instead... interview + pictures + links to listen will be up later!

My heart has a deep affection for people who butcher well-known clichés. Well, not so much the people, per se, but for their mangled malapropisms.

Years ago, I had a friend named Jeannie, who was hysterical all the time and I adored her. I wish I still knew her. She was truly one in a million, a diamond in the rust.

Once upon a time, Jeannie was married to a guy by the name of Mouse, who was constantly misquoting things. So much so that she wanted to write a book full of them and call it, Straight From the Mouse's Mouth. She's a genius, you say? I concur.

And now I'd like to share some of my favorite verbal blunders with you (some Mouse's, but mostly not because sadly, I cannot remember them):

She is a real catch! A diamond in the rust. [rough]
Here Dad, would you like to cut the eucalyptus cord? [umbilical] {This would be one of Mouse's gems - the only one I can recall.}
Oh! It gives me the hydrostatics to such a degree! [hysterics]
Why, murder's the matter! Slaughter's the matter! Killing's the matter! --but he can tell you the perpendiculars. [particulars]
He had to use a fire distinguisher. [extinguisher]
Be sure and put some of those neutrons on my salad. [croutons]
My new coat has lots of installation. [insulation]
He's a wolf in cheap clothing. [sheep's]
We have just ended our physical year. [fiscal]
What are you incinerating? [insinuating]

Have you heard any good ones? Do tell!! And please, use one today while you're out and about. Just for the fun of it!

In Preparation for my INTERVIEW Tomorrow

2009-06-18T14:34:00.000-05:00

Excuse me while I have a little F R E A K O U T!

Success in contingent upon...

2009-06-17T07:38:00.005-05:00

...your participation.

Without you, there is no game, and that is just sad. We all need word games people. Come on now! Rally your enthusiasm! Don't let the government succeed at dumbing us down!

Go ye into the world (or dictionary)(or thesaurus)(or your preferred search engine) and bring me back some gems!

Come on! It'll be fun!

Go now... go read some books.

I Yam What I Yam

2009-06-16T07:52:00.005-05:00

I hereby retract my statement that Sweet Potato ice cream is a comfort food. After 4 bowls in 2 days, I was anything but comfortable.

You know how your Grandma used to warn you about eating sweet potatoes while nursing because it was gonna give that baby the cramps? She wasn't kidding.

I am not saying that I'm writing it off entirely, and will never eat it again. That would be ludicrous. I do not exercise that much control over tasty foods. What I am saying is this:

Don't overdo it folks -- it will make you pay.

May I Have A Word? | Chapter 2

2009-06-16T06:23:00.002-05:00

That's what I've decided to call the new word game.

And it's that time again, so serve 'em up!

I will attempt to have these up on Mondays from here on out, which gives me the week to work in the vocabulations. Today is Tuesday, which doesn't matter in the slightest. I'll work in the words anyhow, and next week, I'll set it to post on time.

BIDNESS: Instead of linking by way of naming the person who gave each word,
I will now link your site to the actual word (like I did in the previous post).
Thank you for calling. If you have any questions, please dial information.

THANK YOU for playing...

Now, may I have a word?

Multi-Topical and Disjointed: Welcome to my head. Let me show you around.

2009-06-15T15:00:00.000-05:00

Pneumonia: The name of the thing that seized my poor Puddin', and attempted to consume us all this week -- also the reason behind my being, well, behind in the word game, and many, many other things.

Sweet Potatoes: Used to make me hungry for November--now makes me hungry for ice cream: Sweet Potato Pie ice cream... the name of one of many things that brought us comfort this week. Thank GOD for comfort! 'Cause sometimes life is hard, y'all.

In other unrelated news,
I made an interesting discovery during our stint. I am not of the [jentacular] sort, unless, of course, coffee counts as breakfast, and in most states, it does not.

Jentacular -- Of or pertaining to a breakfast taken early in the morning,
or immediately on getting up.

However, if in the hospital, I am otherwise persuaded. See, they serve up blueberry muffins with bacon, and also, ham & cheese omelets with bacon. At home, however, laziness (my very own) serves up coffee alone... and the brewing is completely Stretch's doing. All I do is mix it how I like it. Coffee is my "bre-fryst" (as Sweet Pickle says it--which I think is infinitely better than the original). The moral of the story: If you cook it, I will eat it.

In other, other unrelated and disjointed news,
I recently had the pleasure of sharing a new word with my BFF. I learned that one of her favorite scents, the smell of rain, is called [petrichor]. I really like that word.

Petrichor -- "Smell of rain". Petrichor (from Greek petros, "stone" + ichor)
is the name of the scent of rain on dry earth.

Also, I just found a sneaky little Diet Coke hiding in the back of the fridge. Today will be a good day. Amen.

Oblivious + Idiot = Obliviot

2009-06-08T15:50:00.004-05:00

Yesterday I took all three of the kids to Target. (I appreciate your compassion.) Halfway through loading all of our items onto the conveyor belt (which leaves me with half a cart full of other items, in case you're doing the math), a guy with a large suitcase pulls up next in line. He takes his massive luggage and plunks it onto the belt.

Are you kidding? I still have HALF A CART FULL HERE, buddy. Wanna move your luggage?

No, he doesn't. He doesn't even try to keep it from moving forward. I have to unload at mach speed to ensure I have enough space to put my things down. The check-out girl looks at him and then back at me and gives me a look that says, "Is he for real?" And with my eyes, I say, "What is happening here?"

We communicate with our eyes, me and Check-Out Girl. She feels me.

My arms were moving so fast, getting the last of my loot on the belt, that they were a blur to anyone passing by. I was practically The Flash. (Except that for me, the speed was crippling, and when I was done, I was enfeebled.)

As I'm loading my bags into my cart, no lie, the guy plops this gigantic thing onto the tiny table (where you write your checks) and FLIPS IT OPEN! Oh. Yes, he did. And you know what happened? He knocked my groceries onto the floor at this poor girl's feet.

Me and Check-Out Girl? Our eyes are BUGGING OUT! "Can you believe this guy?!"

Not one apology, y'all. Not even a nonchalant, "my bad". NOTHING. Not a sound. Not even a grunt from this apparent caveman who is not accustomed to coming out into society where OTHER PEOPLE LIVE.

Unbelievable.

And every word of it, true.

Fount Drivel. The fount of never-ceasing overflow, apparently.

2009-06-07T09:53:00.000-05:00

Oh look! I found another lost and forgotten almost-post. How very fortunate!

What is the weirdest food you've ever eaten? Doesn't that vary according to geographical location? I mean, I eat crawfish which is not weird to me, but I won't touch grasshoppers or sheep gizzard which may be a delicacy in other countries. Weird is relative. However, in my own opinion, I think maybe the strangest thing I've eaten is kangaroo or shark, or snail.

If you were to perform in the circus, what would you do? I'd like to do the thing with the long fabrics, where you're dangling from the ceiling. If I could do that, it would mean that I was strong. And lean.

Not to mention strong.

And lean.

What article of clothing most closely describes your personality? Eaaazzzyyy. My gray sweater coat.

Who was your favorite teacher and why? Ms. Short. Or as we called her, Lt. Short. She was my English teacher, and also my Advanced Comp teacher. I have two favorite things about her. One was that every day she gave us a new Word of the Day. And maaannn, I love me some words.

The other thing was this philosophy: Show, don't tell.

This woman has shaped my life in ways that she could never know. I'd love to know her again. She was brilliant. She grew up in Pennsylvania, came from a military background and was not Catholic like most everybody else in our tiny Catholic school. She was different in every way, and I loved her for it.

Still do.

What makes you feel the most secure? Family togetherness I think.

If you had a CB radio, what would your "handle" be? Didn't even have to think about this one...

Pegacorn.

Actually, you can call me that now if you want.

Even if we're not communicating via CB radio.

Which, I don't know how we could be, seein' as I don't HAVE a CB radio. (And it's not on my wishlist, either.)

I do like that name though. I like it a great deal. I'd like to adopt it as a nick. It would undoubtedly top the list... or at least come in second, just under Jedi.

Other than material things, what do you constantly think about? What to feed my family. Which I'm not entirely sure, but that may qualify as a material thing.

What is one of the strangest southern expressions (or other idiomatic expressions) you have ever heard? My personal favorite by far, is: Well, ain't this a fine howdy doo!

Now it's your turn. Fire away.

Because why do now what you can put off until you completely forget about it?

2009-06-03T13:16:00.000-05:00

A long day ago, (as Sugarhead says), Mama Belle passed on this award to me.

{Remember that M.B.? Because I totally forgot until I found this draft.}

10 honest things about me...

1. When I incurred this injury last December, my toes were NOT polished.
I quickly realized, however, due to all the pain (OH GRACIOUS! THE PAIN!) that I would not be able to put that thing in a real shoe and I'd have to wear flip-flops to church, on the day of our Christmas production, in which I had a cameo appearance.

It's just like that old saying goes, "Nothing says Christmas quite like flip-flops and the smell of balsam pine".

Stretch gave the last call, "Y'all ready?" and I was all, "I'll be there in a second..." because I was busy polishing my toes mere minutes before Go Time. I am nothing if not vain.

2. Sometimes I think I'd like to pierce my lip (something dainty on the side) but I don't think it would be well-received, and also, (and more importantly) I am a wuss. And a sissy. Plus it doesn't really match all of my cottage-y décor.

3. People think I can make anything, but that's not true. I made clothespin angels with the kids that totally looked like dragonflies. I made them for the sole purpose of being hung on the wall above our Nativity. Y'all all remember the dragonflies coming to visit the sweet baby Jesus right? Yeah, well, they did. Y'all just weren't there to see it.

4. I love the word stupid. What else would you call this?

5. I do not like being publicly recognized, for anything. It embarrasses me and makes me covet the ability to evaporate (but then secretly still be in the room to hear all the nice things people wanted to say about me... because despite my neurosis, I'm always dying to know what people think of me.)

6. I'm honest, and I'm okay with that... because even if it means you might get mad at me, it still makes for the most authentic relationships.

7. I am guilty of looking more at the darkness than at the stars, despite my massive blog title up yonder.

8. Whenever I take quizzes, I tend to fall smack in the middle. Right or Left-Brained? I use both equally. (Secretly though, I wish to be right-brained). Introvert or Extrovert? 56% Intro, and I'm glad to be more intro than extro. Anyway, that's just a lil' [lagniappe].

Lagniappe -- something thrown in, gratis, for good measure.

[Thanks for that word, Mike. You chose something I actually knew!]

9. I have a general distrust of people who live in trailer parks. Stupid and short-sighted perhaps, but there it is.

And finally, 10. I wrote a book, which will land me some spots on radio talking about my book. The whole thing just makes me freak out a little and reach for my deodorant. See number 5.

I'm Published! Now, go ye and make us rich!

2009-06-02T08:27:00.003-05:00

A Review: The Night I Went to a Dance Revue

2009-06-01T03:43:00.000-05:00

In today's post you will find these words, proffered for such a time as this
by Rachel and Jackie, whom I adore.
Good words, girls. Who knew they'd fit my week so neatly?

Demarche -- A course of action; a maneuver.

Cancatervate -- To heap into a pile.

Mulligrubs -- Ill temper; colic; grumpiness.

And now, our story.

Approximately one and one half weeks ago, my friend Cassie and I made plans to attend a dance revue together (which I referred to in an email as a dance "review").

I hang my head in shame even now.

The day of the revue (which I will never ever misspell again, ever, in addition to the word "reservoir" which may or may not have stymied my taking STATE in the '89 (or was it '90?) Spelling Bee) arrived yesterday. Plans began to fall through around three o'clock in the p.m. Stretch would have to work late so I needed a new [demarche] for childcare. Yeeha.

After casting my net for a sitter in the form of a text message blast, I came up empty. My friend Angela, who'd come over that morning for a visit/play date, offered to come back and watch the kids for me so that I could keep my date. {She's a diamond in the rust.}

The plan of action: she'd go home, get her kids bathed and fed and come back, while I did the same here.

I began filling the tub to start baths and noticed the water pressure was low. I walked out to take care of other things (which I can't recall now) and when I returned, it was down to just a trickle, so I shut it off and proceeded to [cancatervate] the children into the tub and scrub them down in just a few inches of water.

A bath is a bath.

Having spent the day laying in the sun, my skin was not ready for the public. It was overladen (read: overloaded) with layer upon layer of Banana Boat Dark Tanning Oil. Hate the feeling, love the scent. The point though, was that there was no way I could show up to the revue (not "review" you dork) like that. And I had no running water. It was so uncivilized.

Suddenly, I remembered those three gallons of water that I'd purchased last year for hurricane season, that were still sitting under the carport. There are days when being a pack rat pays off. This, being one of them.

So with a gallon of water, I:

Brushed my teeth.
Wet a wash cloth and gave myself a quick, make-shift gypsy bath to knock the stank off, which there was plenty of.
Wet, washed and rinsed my filthy head - which is extremely difficult to do with a jug of water that you're trying to reserve... because it was my last. (I'd already used up the other two.) Midway through the rinse, I set the jug down on the side of the tub, but instead of setting it down flat, I put in on the towel I had draped over the side, and then in all my klutzy glory, I knocked it over onto the floor, and watched 1/4 of my last gallon of water flood the floor behind my toilet. Wunderbar.
Enter full-blown mulligrubs, rightly defined as ill-temper, colic and grumpiness. I was heavily afflicted with all three, with the exception of the colic.

It's now 5 o'clock, and Angela will be here at 5:30. My kids? Hungry. My hair? In a towel on my head. The house? Utter chaos. Meanwhile, I'm having to make some calls to get help with our water sit-chee-ation. Our neighbor? Offshore. Our other neighbor? Not home from work yet, but his bride say's she'll have him stop by on his way home. "Oh good! Thank you!"

Angela arrives and kids kick energy into maximum for game of indoor hide-n-seek. Super.

Meanwhile, I'm attempting to fix my hair (which I officially suck at) and walk out to answer the phone. Puddin' wanders into the bathroom (of course he does) and wraps his tiny hand around my very hot curling iron. My next move is swift -- to the kitchen to slather his little fingers with butter (because I remember reading somewhere that that takes the sting out of burns, but he's allergic to dairy, so I sure hope he doesn't have some sort of awful reaction to it on his skin).

The next series of events unfolds something like this:

remember first aid kit in car and rummage until finding burn gel
neighbor shows up to look at well
feel embarrassed, out of control, and guilty for having to leave this mess with my house full of people that don't live here
people total upon departure: 11
supposed to meet friends at 6:15
the next time i look at the time, it's 6:25 and I'm still at home.
leave home when revue is starting
Insanity. Insanity. Insanity.

I think I started breathing normally again somewhere around 7:30 or so. After the REVUE, we went for coffee. I had a steamed milk with vanilla. That, and the sweet girl time, was just what the doctor ordered.

A game? Oh I love games! Pick me! Pick me!

2009-05-28T07:09:00.001-05:00

This is a very exciting day because I have thought up a fun game for you to play! I'm all about the games. Playing, in all its forms, might just be my spiritual gifting. Maybe I can talk God into adding it to "the list". Doubtful, but we'll see.

Okay, so, here's how she works:
You throw out some vocabulations and in return, I will work them into my posts for the week.
How fun is that?!!
'Cause what would be more fun than playing with words?
Oh, I know!
Nothing! Hahahahaha!

Okay, so I don't really have a fancy name for it or anything like that yet. I do think I should pick a day for word offerings though. I'll come up with that later. Let's just start with today and then I'll just wing it from here.

Just for fun, I'll give you a for instance.

You might recommend a word, like, oh I don't know, agowilt, in which case I would have to grab my dictionary because I haven't the slightest what it means (but I like it anyway because I love obsolete words), and then, later in the week, because I will likely have to strain for a while, you might read a sentence that says:

The thought of using unknown words filled her at once with excitement and agowilt.

agowilt- sudden fear; sickening fear

So, we'll all learn new words in context, and I will satisfy my unswerving appetite for words! The words can be obscure, weird.... whatever. Have fun with it!

Ready set go!

Disclaimer:
Let's keep it clean, alright?
Suggestions that are not clean will be promptly deleted.
Play nice, okay? Okay. :)

It's like they're being raised by wolves.

2009-05-27T09:15:00.004-05:00

Sugarhead to her brother: "My oatmeal... you know, that brown one? It tasted good!"

Pause. No response from Sweet Pickle.

"You wanna taste it?", she asks
(touching the corner of her mouth that hasn't yet been cleaned after breakfast).

"Lick it."

How am I ever gonna make these children into something that can be brought out into society?

Originally written 16 Mars 09

{And PS: Yes, I'm back! Hooray!}

No Restraint

2009-05-25T20:43:00.004-05:00

Tucking Sugarhead into bed tonight for at least the 3rd time, she says,
(because she always has to say something)
"Mama, know what I want for breakfast tomorrow?"

"I don't want to talk about that right now", I say. "We'll talk about breakfast tomorrow."

"Okay." (short pause) "Toast."

Indefinite Hiatus

2009-03-11T11:23:00.006-05:00

I'm taking a break, y'all. There are too many things in my life that need attention. Alot of attention. I am so easily and quickly sucked into this thing. This feels like a replay of the last time I took a break, and it is similar... except this time I won't be back in a week.

It's time I faced the music. I've gotta to be honest with myself and hold myself to a standard that I hold other people to, but have been unwilling to live by myself. I think they have a word for that: hypocrisy.

Continuing to spend as much time sitting at this computer as I have been... I can't justify it anymore. I'm overdoing it, and I need to step completely away for a while. Some people are able to balance this part of their life with everything else, but as for me, I have done very poorly. And I need to rectify that.

I teach my children to do the right thing because it's the right thing to do. I guess I'm back in school, relearning that lesson. Stuff is piling up around here, and I'm not just talking about the dust, dishes and unfolded clothes. My priorities are in the wrong place and it's costing me, big time. Bottom line: My house is not in order.

And I need to see about that.

I think it's important that I remind myself that this blog is not my life. It's just a blog. It's not really what's real.

The irony is that the fear of missing out on something "important" has cost me the most important thing. By putting off facing this issue that has been steadily growing and growing, I have sent the message to people I care about that this is more important to me than they are. And that is just wrong.

I don't know how long I'll be gone, but for now I cannot see an end in sight.

Thank you so much for your understanding, and for really making blogging fun for me... really. I'll miss y'all, but I'll see you when I get back!

*** I am still able to be reached by email. All comments left for me here
are sent directly to my email, so if you need me, I can still be found. ***

Thanks again all of my lovely friends!

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

And, just in case you came here looking for something to read,
here are a few links to a few of my favorite posts....

A Thing of Beauty is a Joy Forever
I'm Outdone
I have sunk (sank) (sunken) to a new low
100 Things
I'm no flibberty-ibberty-gibbit
She saw me, and then I saw myself

Okay well, in case I don't see you... good morning, good evening and good night!

Running To and Fro & Hither and Yon

2009-03-09T21:17:00.005-05:00

Before we get to today's post, I want to say thank you to all of you who commented on the previous one. It did just what I had hoped - raised awareness - and that makes me heap glad!

..............................................................................................................................................................

Okay. So remember the running? It has commenced. And I am loving it. For the first 3/4 mile, at least.

And then I'm more or less hating it. But somehow still loving it.

I hate it. But I love it.

And I also love fragments {and rabbit trails, evidently}.
Always love those, never hate them. Just to clarify.

In other news, my mind has been all a-clatter, trying to inwardly organize things for an upcoming event where I will be selling some of my handmades. I am mass producing for the first time ever and she do not agree with me. I'm more of a create-as-the-muse-strikes kind of girl. This whole produce-produce-produce-must-keep-producing mindset is wearing me down... making me nervous.

Generally speaking, I am not a fan of The Nervous. I find it makes it difficult to do stuff.

And I really need to be doing stuff right about now.

I set a goal though. I will use up all of the materials I have, making as many things as possible with what I have on hand. And I will do it all this week.

I'll post some pictures relatively soon.

{Ya like how I threw in that "relatively"
so as not to actually COMMIT to any set and determined time?
See? That's more my style.
To know me is to love me.
Or to be perpetually frustrated.}

One of the things I'm making {Diaper/Wiper Pouches}, I posted pictures of long ago. I'll be making a slew of those, and also something else I have a hard time labeling. They're hand-stitched, framed quotes and words.

Every time people ask what I'm making I go all dead in the eyes. I don't know what to call them.

"Hand-Stitched, Framed Quotes and Words" is a bit loquacious, don't you think? Not to mention lacklustre. And dumb.

If you name them for me, I will make all your dreams come true.

I might even build you a cake or something.

So that is it lovely people.... that's what I've been up to.
Running on my legs, and running in my brain.

I feel like a hamster. Could someone bring me a salad?

traffic

2009-03-04T14:22:00.008-06:00

Imagine for a moment...

A university student is looking forward to her summer job placement she's been promised overseas. She and her friend travel together. They are relieved to be received at the airport by men holding signs, speaking their native tongue. They are informed that plans have changed, and instead of going to Virginia as planned, they will now be heading to Detroit, to work there and to perfect their English skills. Too tired and weary from their long flight to question the change, the girls board a bus to their new destination. When they arrive at the hotel, everything changes.

The door is closed behind them and they are told to sit down. Their passports and papers are confiscated. They are told, "you owe us big money for bringing you here". They are then handed strip clothes and informed that they will be working at a strip club called "Cheetahs" to pay back their debts.

They work 12 hour shifts and are subjected to mental, physical and sexual abuse for one year before they are finally rescued.

Now imagine that's a true story, because it is.

human trafficking:
the recruitment, transportation, harboring
or receipt of people for the purposes of labor and prostitution.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

But this is a people robbed and plundered;
they are all of them snared in holes
and hidden in houses of bondage.
They have become a prey, with no one to deliver them,
a spoil, with no one to say, Restore them!
Isaiah 42:22

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Most of the time I feel ill equipped to do anything about this issue. It is so large, and I have no formal education, you know with degrees and capital letters behind my name which qualify me to do something big... and substantial. When looking at this issue, I quickly become outraged and then frustrated, because I feel powerless to help.

Finally, I've discovered a way to help! And I do mean finally, because I feel like I've wanted to do something for so long now... even more since I first heard the words of Sara Grove's song, When the Saints...

I see the young girl huddled on the brothel floor
I see the man with a passion come and kicking down that door

There's a campaign called The A21 Campaign. In their own words, their purpose is abolishing injustice in the 21st century. Particularly in the area of human trafficking. And I think that's pretty awesome.

I cannot think of a more worthy cause.

And y'all, you know what I love... that people are catching the vision - and offering me an outlet to DO something. Tigers Against Trafficking is a group that got started - that caught the vision - and they're hosting a 5K race at the end of this month. Every single dollar they bring in will go The A21 Campaign. Every single dollar. {Follow the link for more information}

But even if you think that's not for you, don't stop reading!

Not everyone can run that race, and not everyone can donate, but everybody can do something. Something that matters. Something substantial. And it's not just for people in this area. If you live on the globe, you can help. For a full list, click here. And to see if there are other ways to get involved in your area, click here.

I want to get my hands dirty in this. I want to have a part in seeing these people delivered and restored!

And now, FINALLY, I can!

We are called, y'all. Called to care. And true compassion demands action. So that's what I'm doing.

And I am fired up!

I may run that whole 3 miles.

King of Glory, have Your glory!

Colorful Insults

2009-03-01T07:23:00.001-06:00

"You are lower than a hog's belly."

"You are so low you have to look down to look up."

"You got no more sense than a boiled egg."

"If brains were dynamite, you wouldn't have enough to blow your nose."

"You nasty, yellow-bellied, sneakin', lyin', pestiliferous scorpion!"

"You monstracious, cockeyed, good-for-nothing, snaggletoothed gaub of fat!"

"You egg-suckin', sheep-stealin', toad-eatin', frog-hearted, flop-eared groundhog!"

"You filthy, turtle-backed, snake-headed, bowlegged ton and a half of soap grease!"

...Because calling people names should be fun!

Jodie.....

2009-02-28T14:49:00.003-06:00

I recently saw this meme and thought it would be a whole lotta fun! You, too, may play this ridiculous game by googling "your name + given phrase" and then post the nonsensical results. Game on!

Jodie looks like.....
Jodie looks like a big monkey. Hahahaha! That makes me laugh!
Jodie looks like a young. Intuitive... *squints eyes and becomes paranoid and suspicious* ...since I used to BE a YOUNG.
Jodie looks like she is so happy to be a new mom, it is a little weird to see her all grown up. Yeah, being all grown up is a little weird from where I'm standing, too.

Jodie likes.....
Jodie likes to jump off the boat mid-conversation. Untrue. I do not like jumping off of boats.
Jodie likes her crisps and chocolate. I'm not sure what crisps are but they do sound delicious. I probably DO like them. And yes, Jodie likes her chocolate.
Jodie likes Leona Lewis. Oddly enough, I only know one of her songs, and it has been trapped in my head for the past 3 days... I've been humming and singing it just about everywhere I go. I've now reached the point where if you cut me open I keep bleeding Bleeding Love.

Jodie says.....
Jodie says hello. I do!! I'm powerful pleased to see you! Come in a while and rest ya face! Put yourself level on a chair and stay some more!
Jodie says no to surgery. No she don't. I like surgery actually. Surgery is my friend. It made getting my children to the outside of my body a possibility and I welcomed that wholeheartedly!
Jodie says "at da start of da song is it a different language?? Its confusing!!" Yes, yes, that is exactly something I might say.

Jodie wants.....
Jodie wants to be posh. If by posh you mean smart and elegant and fashionable, then why yes. Yes, I do. I want to be posh.
Jodie wants to play. Mmmhm. I know das real. {And there went posh, right out the window!}
Jodie wants to dance! ...all she wants to do is dance! (And she'd like to be good at it too, if it's not too much to ask.... and um, evidently it is.)

Jodie does.....
Jodie DOES NOT RULE! Alright, alright... don't have to be so hostile.
Jodie does it again. I'm not at all sure what to say about this.
Jodie does not have Multiple Personality Disorder. No, she does not. I know, because I just asked her.

Jodie hates.....
Jodie hates her life and looks, but when she wakes up one morning as a stegosaurus things are even worse. Zut alors! This is terrible! My request must've gotten lost in the mail!! I asked to be a UNICORN, not a STEGASAURUS! Somebody get my people on the phone!
Jodie hates numbers. Oooh, indeed I do. Numbers really expose how unsmart I actually am. I've been known to be over-exuberant about payday because I may have miscalculated by a few ~~tens or hundreds of~~ dollars.
Jodie hates the world. Define "the world" and then we can talk some more about this.

Jodie can.....
Jodie can protect herself. Aw yeah! "When I'm hungry I bites the noses off livin' grizzly b'ars!"
Jodie can can be reached by email. Truer words have never been spoken. {Well, maybe they have, but them words right there are really, really, truly true.}
Jodie can be found playing in and around the NYC area. Why yes I can! Late June, you can find me there! And you can also find me in and around the area of DELIGHTED!

Jodie goes.....
Jodie goes out clubbing. No she do not.
Jodie goes to Paris. Oooh really! When? I want to know when?! I need to brush up on my French and start eating beignets and cwoissan's!
Jodie goes home. Home Sweet Home - there's no place like it.

Jodie is.....
Jodie is back. And forth. (I don't know, people. Nothing else comes to mind.)
Jodie is doing very well. I would drop the "very" and call it good.
Jodie is a naturally talented decorator, who creates beautiful solutions to every room in your home. This is false. I am not a "naturally talented" decorator. I wish this were true of me but alas, it is not. I'm still learning how to marry my styles which I think is something like Romantic Country meets Rustic Cottage Something Or Other.

Jodie loves.....
Jodie loves losing clothes. ...It's like Google doesn't even know me.
Jodie loves adam 4eva. Um, sike. (Or is it psych?) But she does love Stretch 4life! Because he is:

2cute
+2b
____
4gotten

Jodie loves the outdoor life. Yes she really does, as long as The Outdoor Life doesn't actually get on her.

Awww, see? Wasn't that fun?! Now go do yours so I can read that!
And have a happy weekend y'all!

Dually Noted

2009-02-26T13:12:00.005-06:00

Note to self:

When swapping books on PaperBack Swap, double-check to make sure that the book you are swapping is, in fact, yours, and not one on loan from someone else. In doing so, you may buffer yourself against high shame, and also having to pay a high price to replace a book which is now out of print.

*sigh*

Duty Calls

2009-02-26T01:40:00.002-06:00

Do what you love.
Know your own bone;
gnaw at it, bury it, unearth it and gnaw it still.
Thoreau

I know I've posted lots of quotes lately.
I can't help myself... they're too good to not share.

And besides that, I am (self-proclaimed) WordGirl, am I not?
I'm doing my duty.

Why I Love Sisters

2009-02-25T16:36:00.002-06:00

A sister can be seen as someone who is both ourselves
and very much not ourselves ---
a special kind of double.

Silly little cubby all stuffed with fluff...

2009-02-24T15:51:00.002-06:00

The spring has sprung
The grass is rizz
I wonder where them birdies is.
- Winnie the Pooh

...willy nilly silly old bear.

Open Season

2009-02-23T09:15:00.009-06:00

I used to run.

I miss running.

With spring around the corner I have a stronger and stronger urge to just get out there and run. I want to load up my iPod with new music --- music that compels me to move --- and run until I don't want to run anymore. I think getting to that point would take a while, and that makes me happy, because I want to be out there as long as I can.

I love running--- it allows me to get to go into a world where no one else lives... the way that being under water seems to affect other people. It's like I've stuck my head into another time and space. Running makes me feel really alive --- like I'm sucking the marrow out of life --- it puts me in touch with a part of myself that seems off limits until I'm out there, in my body.

Even while I run and I feel like my lungs are crushing me from the inside I keep going and I keep telling myself, "I am a runner. I am a runner. I am a runner."

And I am.

I'm just out of season.

I signed up for a small group at our church though; a running group. For three months, we'll run every Saturday morning, training to run a 5K together.

Already I'm feeling like a runner again. And I can't wait to breathe in the sun.

Sick House

2009-02-20T13:03:00.008-06:00

Over the course of the past two weeks, my kids have taken turns being sick with a myriad of symptoms, varying from fever to sore throat to hacking coughs to wheezing and even tossing their groceries on occasion.

I am not a throw up person. I can change any diaper my children can conjure up, but the smell of throw up makes it difficult for me to swallow. [Just like breathing when we drive over road kill. Ugh! I fear I'll get the taste of that stench in my mouth.]

I especially have a low tolerance for hot dog throw up and today, I got to face that fear head on.

Today's round of puke landed partially on me---my clothes and my bare feet.

Yeah, soak that in baby.

I am now back in my pajama pants, because I am that ready to crawl back into my bed. Too bad it's only 1 o'clock.

Oh well, at least I have nap time to look forward to --- even if I'm not the one partaking in that sweet, sweet slumber.

And now, I think I need another Diet Coke.

Edited to add:
PS - Who is "Gazelle Enthusiast"? Reveal your secret identity. Please? :)

Edited again to add:
Thank you "Gazelle Enthusiast" for making yourself known. I never would've known it was you, Stretch. And you know that would've just bothered me. :)

Weekend Getaway, Part Deux: Stellar Saturday

2009-02-17T09:59:00.007-06:00

Top o' the morning, at 8 o'clock, coffee was delivered to our room. Cute, little, tiny coffee.

The little handles on the cups were so tiny you had to pinch them. There was no way you were getting a finger through that hole.

Clearly, I needed that little "spot" of coffee... looks like I'd had a long night, whatwith all the thoughts of REDRUM and all.

{A few of you mentioned The Shining in yesterday's comments... um yeah, that's what I was thinking too.}

After breakfast we took the house tour, which I really enjoyed. We got our learn on; the lady who lead the tour was quite knowledgeable. Here are a few of my favorite photos from the tour.

The Calling Card Table

I had never seen a Calling Card Table before, but I love the sentiment behind it. I love most things about that time period. I love the idea of having a family "call upon you" at your home... Things are so different now, and sure I could recreate alot of that in my own home, but I know you would all think I was a freak, plus I may have mentioned a time or sixty, I am a bit lazy. I would however, love to live in a home where all these things were done FOR ME TO ENJOY. That would be splendid. By the way, the upholstery you see on that chair is the original, and it dates back to the 1890s.

Other things we saw that I had never seen before were: knife urns, a humidor and fire screens (to keep beeswax makeup from melting right off the ladies' faces).

I loved this sofa.

And this carriage!!

They even had the Bill of Sale.
How much do you think all of THAT is worth on the Antiques Road Show?!
Well over $1,075 I'd bet, which is what they paid for it.

After the tour, we decided to hit the town. For a second helping of nachos. We tried to see what Death by Nachos felt like. Turns out it feels delicious. But we didn't die.

Or did we?

Hmmm.

After nachos and burgers and maybe even some shrimp & okra gumbo, we went back to the house for a nap. Understandably so. After we woke up, we took a stroll around the home's extensive property.

What remains of an old greenhouse

Stretch's postcard shot of the rickety old wooden bridge
(now complete with steel reinforcements, Thank You Jesus)

My head is down because I'm looking for steel bars that ensure my footing.
I do NOT do my own stunts.

A gazelle we saw late in the afternoon.

So, here's the final breakdown:

tiny coffee + delightful house tour + more nachos + the best Greek/Lebanese meal I've ever had at our favorite place with NO RESERVATIONS on Valentine's night + a full love tank from a fantastic time with my Valentine = Stellar Saturday

We came home Sunday feeling refreshed and connected.

And that my friends, is a very, very good thing. Stellar, actually.

Weekend Getaway, Part Un: Freaky Friday

2009-02-16T19:03:00.005-06:00

Stretch whisked me away for the weekend. We had planned to go to one place and he (sneaky little thing) surprised me with an announcement that we were not in fact going to that place, we were going to a different place. A bed and breakfast. He knows that those words are my love language.

I will not disclose the name of the place though, because I want to speak freely about our experience there. And let me just get that out in the open right now... it was an experience.

I'm so glad he took me there!

Also, I have to break this down into two days. Each day deserves its own space. You will soon understand why.

Okay so here we go.

Freaky Friday.

I learned something new about myself. I do not like going into new, unfamiliar territory under the cover of night. Especially if that territory is set back into the woods and involves a wooden bridge. That right there, is a recipe for the booboo jeebies. Oh, and I got 'em.

We pulled up to the place and were greeted by a woman to check us in and show us to our room. It did not go unnoticed that there was a rather large (perhaps half-gallon) bottle of Jack Daniels on the kitchen counter.

We were then lead up a long, narrow staircase.

At the top of that staircase, we hooked a right (because we were in the East Wing) and found ourselves facing the longest, most narrow and also most creepy hallway I have ever seen. Located at the far (dark) end of that hallway, was a door. Actually, the hallway was flanked on both ends by identical doors. Standing smack in the middle of those doors, at the top of the stairway, I realized I was more than a little scared to be where we were.

Now you tell me that doesn't freak you out just a little bit and I will tell you, YOU my friend ARE A LIAR!

But all was not lost.

We settled into our rooms and found this beautiful little sweet treat.

We also found that we didn't know how to lock the doors. Great. Freaky Factor skyrocketing by the second. I'm not going to the bathroom by myself in here.

Meanwhile, other guests are arriving (PRAISE THE LORD) and we were joking about the Jack Daniels lady. I heard her coming up the stairs and said, "Go ask her how to lock the door!!" And then, just for good measure, I added, "Go ask Jack Daniels. Go ask Jackie." {Cause you know, I thought I was so funny, giving her such a clever nickname.}

Well, Stretch opens the door and as this clearly intoxicated woman is descending the stairs he says, "Ma'am, um, Mrs. Jackie, could you tell me how to lock our door?"

Well, I 'bout lost it! I was, as we say, crezzin'- stifling my uncontrollable laughter by burying my face in the bed sheets. It should also be noted that the backside of our bed was the same wall that ran alongside the staircase, so basically what I'm saying is, "Mrs. Jackie" was standing pretty much right behind me when Stretch said that.

To this day, we don't know that woman's real name. We just call her Jackie. But we do know, because she told us, that we were not dressed fancy enough to eat at the Oxbow Restaurant (which is unfortunate because we later found out that the décor there was somethin' else.)

We made it through the night without incident. I prayed y'all. A bunch. Because girlfriend was frightened. I was glad to know Jesus, but I was still some. scared.

And that concludes Friday.

Tomorrow's post, Stellar Saturday. Look for it.

It was really that good. You know, good enough for a "stellar" rating.

For me anyway. See ya then!

{Verbs & Nouns}

2009-02-16T18:39:00.001-06:00

I finally got some pictures posted on my other blog, {Verbs & Nouns}.

Feast your eyes mah deahs..

The Useless Trivia, It Just Keeps Flowing

2009-02-05T12:29:00.009-06:00

This has been going around Facebook like a stomach bug. Everybody's catching it! People are tagging and being tagged LEFT and RIGHT! But I ain't gon' lie, I like it.

25 Random Stuffs About Me

1 I love laughing. It's my favorite.

2 I'm noticing more and more lines on my face. Smile lines around my eyes, creases in my forehead from a furrowed brow, and these 2 lines { || } just above the bridge of my nose that look like a pause symbol. Most of those lines are just proof that I fret.

3 I love typing. I used to phantom-type words on my legs while I was talking to people. Fancy fidgeting.

4 I lived in a halfway house for 9 months, and I believe it was instrumental in saving my life.

5 I can't decide if I'm more introverted or extroverted.

6 I hate the hunter green/burgundy/navy blue color combo.

7 I have a tattoo. I wish I had been more particular about my choice though --- it should've been a unicorn.

8 I miss singing, but I'm terrified to start up again.

9 I won a Spelling Bee when I was in the 4th grade. Spelling excites me.

10 I have my own blog that I want everyone to read and know about {and love}, and then I get all nervous when I find out people I know are reading and knowing about it.

11 I love that I know how to sew, knit, cross-stitch and embroider. {Oh yeah, and decoupage.---that's for you Holly!}

12 I also love: paper, chocolate mint, gift wrap, swans and rabbits.

13 My love for swans is a recent development. SWANS, of all things. Coulda been worse, I suppose. I could've developed as obsession with leg warmers, and that would just be tragic and unfortunate.

14 I do not have a green thumb. I have killed, in my lifetime, two (2) cacti. (And yeah, I know, no one says cacti but cactuses sounds sooo duuumb.)

15 I miss ballet so, so much.

16 I suck at time management. I am what you might call "of the lazy persuasion".

17 I love nesting---and I also like birds and nests, which is not directly related... Danny says I like the nests&birds so much because he's part egret.

18 I am a word NERD. I love language. I would love to take a class that requires nothing of me but to diagram sentences ALL. DAY. LONG. Just the thought makes my heart beat a little faster.

19 I did not graduate from college. I "took off a semester" to get married and never went back. And now I have all these kids... but I'm okay with that.

20 I used to swim in the ditch when I was little. I also used to walk a tight rope between 2 trees in my backyard.

21 I know how to cut a sweet trail with a machete.

22 I have no friends that I can trace back to the beginning of my life. Only family. Too much moving, and too little connecting.

23 I tend to think of the glass as half empty.

24 I feel very fortunate to have people in my life that teach me truth and give me grace.

25 I love Pride & Prejudice and wish I lived in that era, except with plumbing. "...it's all very (veddy) vexing... I am quite put out!"

A Smattering of Good Words

2009-02-03T09:58:00.004-06:00

If you don't like laughing really hard, don't read this. Otherwise, by all means, carry on {my wayward son}. [sorry]

Antique Mommy wrote a fantastic parenting analogy. It is SPOT ON! If you are a parent, you will love this. I just know it. And I believe that you will agree wholeheartedly!

Lastly, what Sue wrote about morning routines is fantastically funny! Trust me, it's funnier than that sentence makes it sound. I promise. It is SO VERY worth your time, because you will relate and you will laugh... if you have little ones to ship off to school that is.

Okay, off you go!

([{something something something something)]}

2009-01-26T16:14:00.011-06:00

Before I begin with today's scheduled program, let me just say that y'all are the best! Turns out most of my peeps are regulars, which just makes me so happy. :) I am always glad for new people to love me {of course} but I love my faithfuls. And might I just add, y'all are some entertaining people! I just love what food items you'd like to have "on tap", in the case that you were able to {sweet mercy from Heaven} dispense something from your navel. Y'all are so fun!

OH! And Tracy G --- I have no other way to contact you, so please forgive me for saying this publicly: I just had to tell you Thank You for stalking me! That makes ME smile! And girl, you are so very brave [and you're also my new hero]... I cannot believe that you took your 4 YOUNG CHILDREN across so many state lines camping. In my mind, I think that that would really be a blast and aLOT 'o fun, but it also terrifies me. You are an inspiration to us all! :)

Lately, days and days pass between postings. I wish that weren't so, but my brain seems to be thinking only short thoughts. Things that if posted beg for a list format.

Such as:

{{Every time I say that, the next thing to pop into my mind is: the Iraq}}

1. Heather Bullard's site. When I found her blog, I could not move from my chair. Page after page after page... I couldn't turn away. Seriously, I wish I could make my house look like hers--with so apparent little effort of the mind. She makes it look easy. [says in airy voice...] It's sooo beautifuuuullll...I swear to you, never before have I seen so many things I JUST LOVE in one collective place. So much loveliness. She has a gift that I covet.
2. Got a new journal. So promising. So intimidating.
3. Got a new vacuum. The beginning of my relationship with a new vacuum is always so hopeful. So far, I am smitten. I've found lost toys with that vacuum. That is some serious suction action.
4. I keep trying to think of a way to incorporate more pink into our home.
5. Why is it so easy to know what I love when I see it, and yet have such difficulty just creating what I love?
6. I've considered doing the Project 365 thing but I just reeeaaallly do not want to commit. I am resistant to anything regimented or required of me on a daily basis. HOWEVER, I would like to have a general documentation of our year in photos. I'd like to look back over that as time goes on, and remember things I might've otherwise forgotten. So then, after a few days of deliberating, I have created Verbs & Nouns. {You may (or may not) have noticed that I changed the name. Initially I had created Hotchpotch Goulash, but I found myself liking it less and less... So I deleted it, and created instead, Verbs & Nouns: Because sometimes life moves. And sometimes it stands still.} T'aint much to look at yet, but soon, I'll start posting photos. Soon is a relative term, of course.
7. Do tiny tornadoes pass through my house while my back is turned at the sink? [ah, Who am i kidding? The computer] Every day?
8. Yes, they must.
9. How else does all this mess happen?
10. Maybe, just maybe, it's three tornadoes. Three very short ones, since all of the mess seems to land on the floor.
11. Yes, that's probably what happens.
12. I can't seem to find just the thing to tie my whole bathroom together. In my mind though, whatever it is, I think it must be red. I cannot make peace with that room until it is complete. And complete, it is not.
13. I need to improve my preparation of vegetables. Love them as I may, I still fall short in tasty preparation. And you know, variety.
14. I have a punctuation issue. I have trouble deciding between (), [], and {}. 'Course I like 'em all - I'm just trying to settle on a favorite --- for consistency's sake.
15. I have the messiest baby in all the land. {Yes, I do.}
16. I tend to nest a few times a year. Sometimes it's decorating, sometimes it's cleaning or organizing. Currently, it's all of that, with particular focus on putting things in containers. (Sidenote: I do not balk at spending money on earrings or any variety of fun items, but looking at the cost spent on organizing always feels too high. Why all the resistance to something that makes me feel so good when things are tidy?)
17. Stretch just ordered the P90X. I hope to amaze myself. And I also hope to not disappoint myself. And yes, those are two separate distinctions.

Show Yourself! (I already heart you)

2009-01-22T11:36:00.004-06:00

I missed it again! Last year I missed it and I swore that the next time it came around, I would not be caught half-steppin' and yet here I am. 10 days late for my favorite online holiday. [I didn't always have a favorite online holiday but when I found out about Delurking Day, then suddenly, my favorite emerged, with no effort at all.]

Thankfully, the cute little graphic doesn't contain a date - only a year - so if I hadn't ousted myself, you might not know how very late I am in celebrating! And I don't use the word celebrating lightly. I celebrate your presence here. You're very important to me. Truly, you are.

So, if you've been coming here for a while [or even if you're brand-spankin' new], today you have to tell me in the comment section that you've been stalking me. ;) And you really do have to(PLEASE!), because it's a holiday! And besides, it would just make my day. I'd love you like I love Wild Cherry Pepsi.

If you don't know what you might say, maybe you could answer a question.

Here, I'll provide you with some options:
(1) If you could dispense any condiment from your navel, what would it be? It's really a toss up for me--chocolate or buffalo sauce. I love them both immensely.
(2) What book, other than the Bible, has influenced you greatly? Two books top my list. Inside Out by Larry Crabb and The Shack by William Young (which tragically, I almost didn't finish)
(3) When was the last time you did something for the first time? What was it? I love this question, but I really had to think back... seems I haven't stretched myself in a while. ...well, I booked a trip to NYC in June. [Okay, I know that's puny. Really, really puny. But nothing else comes to mind! Ask me again in July and I can say - I WENT TO NEW YORK! BOO-YA!]

Okay, your turn! Go! Expose yourself! I see you anyway. See that little sitemeter icon way down at the bottom of this page? I'm watching you... ;)

The Honest Truth

2009-01-21T08:18:00.004-06:00

The other day I asked my Sweet Pickle, "Do you think these jeans make Mama look fat?"

[Right here, you're probably thinking, what is wrong with her?! I asked because I really wanted to know. I know that he adores me to the skies and loves me to the moon and back and back again, and I also know that if I really want his assessment, I can ask him. He'll tell me.]

So I asked my 5 year old because I wanted an honest opinion that I could believe.

[I couldn't ask Stretch because that's never a safe question for the husband. It's cruel and unusual punishment. He can't win that. If he says no, he's obviously lying (because we never believe their compliments, or our mother's). But who in his right mind says yes?! An evil and cruel and horrid man who would be thenceforward banished to the wastelands forever.]

"Um, yeah, a little," saith my Sweet Sweet Pickle.

"Where?"

He walks up behind me, slaps me on my left cheek and then my right, saying "here, and here." Then he walks around the front and slaps me once on each thigh and says again, "here, and here."

He was quite nice about it, too - jaunty and with a smile in his voice. Not even a hint of mean--not a shred. Which makes me love his openness that much more.

He's my Mirror Mirror on the Wall. My lie detector.

If only he was as reliable when there's an altercation between himself and his seester....

Twitter. It's dead to me.

2009-01-19T15:51:00.004-06:00

Twitter. Another word for WASTE MY TIME LIFE SUCKING DEVICE.

Because I'm a sucker for such devices, I signed up [because I didn't want to miss anything and be out of the loop, thereby making myself a loser blogger because I didn't know when other bloggers had gone to Target or drank a Caramel Macchiato or ate a pint of Ben & Jerry's] and promptly began neglecting it because' really? I don't care.

I really just don't care. The whole thing just makes me feel heavy and weighted down.

So about a week or two ago [I never really know how much time has passed], I tried to sign on so that I could just delete my account. I keep getting emails that soandso is now following me on Twitter, and I just think, poor fools, there's nothing to follow. Unless of course, someone hacked into my account (again) and there are some updates that I'm unaware of. Because like I was saying, I tried to sign on and it kept saying my signin/password were incorrect, so I contacted them for some technical support and the instructions they gave medidn't work.

Seems no one knows how to get me back in.

Doesn't matter though, because I have zero energy for twitter. I'm all tweeted out. If I could log on and update it today I'd probably say something like that... I'm all tweeted out. Peace Out. Shalomey Homies. And then I'd promptly delete my account.

But I can't do that. Because I can't log in.

I don't really have a clean way to wrap this up. I know a few of you were following me. Thank you for helping me to feel more popular, and I'm sorry there was never anything of consequence to follow.

This is my public announcement that I will be Twitter-ing no more. My official hasta luego, if you will.

And there ya have it.

Oui

2009-01-16T13:07:00.005-06:00

I say no alot.

I've trained myself - to keep out pain, disappointment, hurt, rejection. I think we all know how that's turned out. And now what began with an enticing payoff has ended up costing me more than I like paying.

Still I hear myself saying it. Wanting to say it, and yet not wanting to say it, always wrestling.

I say no to my kids. No to myself. No to risk. No to intimacy. No to inconvenience and noise and stuff that make things messy. No to life.

I think though, that the part of me--the part that automatically, without thinking, says no--is on a slow train down a new track. There is something else in me, a far off voice saying yes...

I got some sweet cash for Christmas, and immediately started hunting down ways to spend it, because this girl loves stuff. I stumbled upon an Etsy store that became one of my major, major favorites. This girls jewelry looks like something from a fairy tale... something a woodland maiden (like me) would wear. One piece in particular though, grabbed me. I fell instantly in love. I saw it, I loved it. It's like we were meant to be together... me and Oui.

Photo: property of trystbykerry

Obviously I love it because it's French. I find that extremely charming. But beyond that, I get it. I know why I love it so. It reminds me of what to answer the invitations in my life with... invitations to play hard, and to do hard things.

Say yes, Jodie. No more of this Just Say No nonsense. Say oui.

That, and it's really, really pretty.

A Fluke

2009-01-15T21:36:00.003-06:00

The strangest thing happened today. Trés bizarre.**

I was productive, and I mean, really productive. I got some stuff done.

I am, by nature, what one might call of the lazy persuasion. A slouch. I'd much rather sleep all day, only arising to ascertain something mighty delicious to chew or sip, and then go lay on the couch for a long nap afterwards.

That was not my day today. Or any day really. It's just what I aspire to.

Today though, was different from the usual strong résistance [say it with the accent] to get up from the computer chair. I didn't even sit in the chair until almost 11 and let me tell you, that is a feat. I couldn't sit though, because I had to get my house shipshape (or as they say in Danish, i fin orden) by noon because we were having a visitor--a contractor/builder-person-man who would do a walk-through, even into my bedroom.

[Just to illustrate the task set before me, let me tell you a quick story. Last week, I lost My Precious. Maybe you've seen it before? If you've seen me, you've seen it because I wear it almost as often as I wear my skin. My gray sweater coat. Lost it. I LOST IT! I called here and there and everywhere - even to places I KNEW I hadn't brought it because you know how you do that when you lose things. You lose your mind. Where, OH WHERE! could it be? What if it's gone forever?! I searched everywhere. You know where I finally found it? Mmhm, it was in my room. Buried deep beneath a mountainous mountain of other things.]

And so now you can clearly see what kind of pickin' up I had to be doin' in the span of 2 hrs. And I did it too! And you know what I thought about for the rest of the day? How good it felt to have such a clean house by noon.

I could've sat down all day, for the remainder of the afternoon, eatin' chips, and my house would've been fine. [Well... if I had tied up Puddin', that is, because that child is a MESS. I lost count of how many times I made him stop digging in the trash today. Or wiped up something he had spilled. He's like a little untrained puppy dog. If you've ever had one in your house, you know what I'm talking about. But dang, he's cute! ]

I did not sit down for the remainder of the day, though. Instead I decided to cook some stuff. Dinner was leftovers - some tasty vittles, too. So, I decided to try two new recipes. Homemade hot chocolate made with condensed milk hallelujah and amen, and I also tried my hand at marshmallows [or as I like to call them, Marthamallows].

I hope that tomorrow I can remember how good it felt to get all of that done today. But if that falls through, then maybe I can just settle for my "ideal day" as illustrated in paragraph three.

**And about all the French you're seeing here lately... I'm way smarter than y'all thought, huh? Or maybe I changed the settings? I really just wanted to see the date in French. The rest is lagniappe. They gave me that for free.**

Public Service Announcement

2009-01-14T13:03:00.003-06:00

Y'all.

I went to WalMart this morning. I hate WalMart. But I can't stay away.

While there, I decided to peruse the women's clothing section. (Because I can never stay away from the Women's Clothing Section). Seems I'm always in need of new tops. Oddly enough, the Women's Top seems to be my fashion achilles heel. I can buy awesome Outerwear, Footwear and Accessories all day--no problem. The thing I always have a shortage of is good shirts. I was feeling pretty hopeless, like I had an innate inability to choose cute, affordable, well-fitted shirts. The only thing I felt confident buying was something very much like a gussied up t-shirt. Perhaps something with elbow length sleeves if I was going for "fancy".

And so I'm looking around, not finding much of anything. As usual. And then BAM! Out of nowhere I see this tiny section of CUTE shirts. I mean, these clothes were nice.

And nice is not usually my go-to word when I'm talking about the clothes at The Walmark.

Of course I don't love all of it, but I saw lots of stuff I'd like to have. Look at what I bought today. I think tomorrow I may go back for it in purple. WalMarks (with their trickery) won't let me copy their images, and so instead, I have to link to them. Crafty little devils.

The brand is called To The MAX.

Look for it. I mean, if you can tolerate long check-out lines, grim cashiers and a generally filthy store and parking lot, that is.

de janvier à décembre

2009-01-02T23:09:00.000-06:00

I've said before that I'm bilingual. That I speak music. I think, rather, that the truth is that music speaks me.

This past year, as it is with every year, there are songs that fill the spaces in my mind and my heart. Songs that I hear God's voice in; songs that draw my voice from me.

And so, my year, in song... These words have been my anthem, and seeing them on paper, they seem to follow a theme.

de janvier à décembre

[Have I mentioned before that I love French? Because I do. I love French.]

[From the Inside Out - Hillsong United]
A thousand times I've failed
Still Your mercy remains And should I stumble again
I'm caught in Your grace
In my heart and my soul
Lord I give You control
Consume me from the inside out
And the cry of my heart
Is to bring You praise
From the inside out
Lord my soul cries out

[Shadowfeet - Brooke Fraser]
Walking, stumbling on these shadowfeet
Toward home, a land that I've never seen
I am changing
Less and less asleep
Made of different stuff than when I began

[You're Gonna Miss This - Trace Adkins]
Five years later there's a plumber workin' on the water heater
Dog's barkin', phone's ringin'
One kid's cryin', one kid's screamin'
And she keeps apologizin'
He says "They don't bother me.
I've got 2 babies of my own.
One's 36, one's 23.
Huh, it's hard to believe, but...

You're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this

[Awakening - Switchfoot]
I want to wake up kicking and screaming
I want to wake up kicking and screaming
I want to know that my heart's still beating,
It's beating, I'm bleeding.
I want to wake up kicking and screaming
I want to live like I know what I'm leaving
I want to know that my heart's still beating,
Is beating, Is beating, It's beating, I'm bleeding

[Desire - Phil Wickham]
I’m running through the gates of love, as fast as I can
I can’t wait to see You 'cause I’m a desperate man
You made the light and sent it down
to show us who You are
Now it’s bursting out my heart
My desire is burning like a million stars
And I’ll keep reaching out, reaching out for You

[The Cut - Jason Gray]
My heart is laid
Under Your blade
As you carve out Your image in me
You cut to the core
But still you want more
As you carefully, tenderly ravage me
Mingling here
Your blood and my tears
As You whittle my kingdom away
But I see that you suffer, too
In making me new
For the blade of Love, it cuts both ways

And You peel back the bark
And tear me apart
To get to the heart
Of what matters most
I’m cold and I’m scared
As your love lays me bare
But in the shaping of my soul
They say the cut makes me whole

Hidden inside the grain
Beneath the pride and pain
Is the shape of the man
You meant me to be
Who with every cut now you try to set free
Come now, set me free

I'd like to see some more of this theme this year.

Less rules.
Less ceremony.
Less and less asleep.

More grace.
More desperation.
More whittling away of my kingdom.
More freedom.
More of the shape of the one I'm meant to be.

The Doctrine of Grace

2009-01-02T08:26:00.006-06:00

If I had to choose one thing to really, truly GET, to have settled on my insides this year, this would be it.

“If the people do not like the doctrine of grace, give them all the more of it.”
—Charles H. Spurgeon

Because...

"Rules cannot bring freedom; they only have the power to accuse. It is true that relationships are a whole lot messier than rules, but rules will never give you answers to the deep questions of your heart and they will never love you."
—William P. Young

To Love Without an Agenda

2008-12-29T16:52:00.003-06:00

...All I want from you is to trust me with what little you can,
and grow in loving people around you with the same love I share with you.
It's not your job to change them, or to convince them.
You are free to love without an agenda.
-taken from The Shack
(I've decided to finish it. And I'm so glad I did...)

and then there's this, which seem to go hand in hand with the other thing:

Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully
as when they do it from a religious conviction.
-Blaise Pascal

Just ask anyone who has been "ministered to" from that angle.
Or ask someone who has been on the giving end.
I've been on both.
Ugh.

Cheap Therapy

2008-12-24T07:19:00.005-06:00

A God Who cares.
Someone to talk to and open up the gates of the ugly cry.
A cold, cold Fresca with some cold, cold ice cubes.

Exhale.

That feels much better.

And then my Sweet Pickle drew me a picture and labeled it Mighty Mama - with very large arm and leg muscles. Because, he says, that means I'm strong.

And then last night during supper, my little Puddin' kept leanin' his head in over and over for more and more kisses and loveys. He even rubbed my leg a little. Sweet thing.

The night may continue for a while, but the sun does come up in the morning.

Merry Christmas, y'all. And because her words are so beautiful, go read Anna Maria Horner's short closing paragraph.

**Edited: Christmas Day, I signed on, because I'm sick like that, and this is the quote that greeted me:

The birth of Jesus is the sunrise in the Bible.

Well, Amen to that.

Low

2008-12-22T18:15:00.005-06:00

Invisibility is over-rated. I'd much prefer the super power of the balance of justice with grace.

What I'm saying over and over to my children is not getting through and so I say it louder and louder, until they cry, and it's my turn to apologize.

Again.

There's a silent angry river that runs through me. It yells and occasionally cusses and then runs and hides, somewhere deep because it's afraid of itself.

My dairy-allergic son eats M&Ms from the trash can. M&Ms that were dug up from under a 2-day old wet Pull-Up. Disgusting and Dangerous. Red splotches show up a few minutes later on his face and I give him a full tsp of Benadryl and secretly wish I was better than I am.

I just wanna go to bed.

I've had enough today.

I want to sleep until I'm better.

Earlier in the day, I'm making an impromptu felt dinosaur upon Sweet Pickle's request and he wants to watch me stitch it. I say okay. He watches me stick the needle into a fold in my jeans and says, "Mooommm, you put a hole in your jeaaannnnsss". "Don't touch it", I say. He reaches over to touch it and jabs me twice with the needle. I yell at him, my small 5 year old, something like, "What are you doing?! I just said don't touch it! How did that get lost in translation and you now think it's okay to touch it?! You stuck me with the needle twice!!" His face deteriorates and he starts to cry.

What good is an apology when I lose it so many times in a day.

I keep breaking stuff that I can't fix.

Every time I yell I think I send a loud message to my children: Why can't you get it right? And yet I feel powerless to stop. I feel like nothing else I'm doing is getting results. I feel overtaken by this ugly thing. This ugly thing that produces results that I don't want.

I think I understand to some degree the women who've said their children would be better off with someone else.

I hate this thing. And I hate that it's taking so long to change. I want my heart to embrace my roles now. It's a bitter pill to swallow. To see myself. To really see myself and that there is no good thing in me.

It's a crappy place to be.

Actually, on spiritual terms, it's probably a great place to be.

But it feels like crap.

Perhaps tomorrow will be more cheery. I hope so. For my family's sake. But today, something is under my skin and I feel discontent and bitchy.

I know it won't last. I know I'll get to a better place soon. Today's quote is suitable though, don't you think?

“He became what we are that he might make us what he is.”

Haste the day.

Livin' the Dream

2008-12-21T21:10:00.008-06:00

SUNDAY

Wake up, injure toe by merely exiting the bed. Grace-full. [And frail, evidently.] That's me.

DAILY
Take Puddin' down from kitchen table.

[And yes, my table IS always that pristine.]

From the look on his face, you can see he's highly concerned for his safety. However, this singular action is cause for his Mommy to leave her happy place no less than 15 times a day.

FRIDAY
Make very first decoupage as gift for niece with first initial, A.
Beam, because I'm so pleased with how it turned out.

IN BETWEEN HOBBLING AND GLUING AND REMOVING SMALL CHILD FROM HIGH PLACES:
Wrap gifts - almost my favorite part of giving.

And then there's this, which really got me out of my comfort zone.

We made these:
(Mama does not like to intentionally make more messes she has to clean up.)

(Even in the name of fun and good memories.)

(Because I suck like that.)

That's Pam spray that gives their hands such a high shine.

Seriously? Pam? On 4 and 5 year old hands? Isn't that sort of, um, messy?

Yeahhhhh..... It iiisss........

And there you have it.
In part at least.
My week.
Livin' the dream.

Wondering what to eat for Christmas Dinner? Not me.

2008-12-16T21:29:00.003-06:00

Christmas Tour of Homes '08

2008-12-13T11:00:00.001-06:00

We begin this tour with two recipes that contain chocolate. You gonna wanna get a pen...

Ya may find my photography throughout to be a bit lack-luster [or lustre if you wish you were British, like me] but this recipe is anything but. It is totally with-lustre... have-lustre. Whichever.

Peppermint-Mocha Coffee
6 C freshly brewed coffee
4 squares Baker's semi-sweet baking chocolate
1 1/2 C hot milk
1 tsp peppermint extract
8 peppermint sticks (the soft, melt in your mouth kind)
RediWhip

POUR coffee into large saucepan. Add chocolate; cook on low 5 minutes or until chocolate is melted, stirring occasionally.
ADD milk and extract; stir until well blended. Garnish with RediWhip and a peppermint stick, and maybe some crushed peppermint nestled into your RediWhip waves. The recipe doesn't call for that tidbit, but you want it.

This other recipe I haven't yet tried myself. I will though, because I've had a hankering for this sort of thing for some time now.

So here it is - Put the 'HOT' in your COCOA
Melt a square or two of bittersweet chocolate in a mug of hot milk. Mix in a dash each of ancho and chipotle chile powders and cinnamon, then finish with a splash of vanilla extract (and don't forget the whipped cream).

Now, I don't know about you, but to me, that spells FASCINATING and DELECTABLE.

Now for the tour of my home - comprised mostly of pictures and words.

A few favorite ornaments:
1) The Tree - silky & beaded on the front, velvet on the back. I'm fairly certain my mansion in Heaven will be completely constructed out of velvet.

2) The Mirrored Angel and also a peek at The Red Garland That Warms & Charms

And now, please allow me to introduce you to my favorite penguins...

Joyce & Herschel.
They enjoy spending their days keeping an eye on the coffee pot and talking smack to each other...

(overheard) Herschel, do not get fresh with me...

You see dis slap? [raises eyebrows and widens gaze]
You gon' walk over, but you gon' limp back.
[She's very sassy. Poor Herschel.]

I also have some reindeer, but I prefer to call them reindiers [pronounced: dee-airs].
Now, the tree... Ta Daaaaaa! This is the part where my photography fails me. It's alot prettier in person. I swur (swear) it.

Thank you for coming! Before you go, you must watch this because ~~I am bossy~~ you CANNOT have a "Mady Chrithmahsth" without it! [I already posted this about 2 weeks ago (maybe you noticed?), but I never tire of it... and so, again. More Dave Barnes. You're welcome.]

For more of this kind of Tour-y thing, get yerself to BooMama's House and foller some o' them links down yonder. You'll probably enjoy it. It's always fun looking in other people's houses.

And shopping carts.

But that's a whole 'nother post entire.

Mady Christhmahsth and Happy New Jear's!

Never In My Life

2008-12-12T10:33:00.005-06:00

I've never seen it snow like this here.

Not ever.

Flurries. Sleet. Ice on the ground. A little snow piled up on windshield wipers. Yes.

But not this much. And it was stunning!

And magical.

I hope it won't be the last time...

Siesta Ornament Exchange '08

2008-12-11T09:15:00.000-06:00

I'm breaking the rules and doing this a few days early. The real exposé isn't until the 15th, but that's also the day of BooMama's Christmas Tour of Homes and I didn't want to do them together.

This year I decided to participate in the Siesta Fiesta Ornament Exchange, because I [evidently] like to inundate myself with more and more things to do at the busiest time of year. I signed up initially because I thought it would be fun, and even though it put one more thing on my already tiring TO DO list, I signed up anyway.

And I'm glad I did.

It's very sweet to know that someone I've never met invested their time and resources into my little family unit in a way that I'll remember every year.

I got paired up with Rachel, of Freedom-Bound Captive, who has a beautiful family by the way. Here is the ornament her family sent to ours:
She has a tiny inscription down the side of her gown that reads, "Peace be with you". Isn't she lovely? I like her alot. So much so that by looking at her, it's as if Rachel DOES know me, because this is something I would've chosen for myself. :)

But that's not all. She went a step further and also sent these edible Rice Krispy Treat "ornaments" that her 2 beautiful girls made for my three kidlets! Sweet, huh? My kids sure liked their thoughtfulness!

Thank you again, Rachel! You really made this fun!

If you're interested in seeing other exchanges, follow this link, right chere.

Or this one.

They're the same. :)

But don't follow them until Monday! Because the real Show 'n Tell doesn't start officially until then.

And now, I REALLY love Carol of the Bells...

2008-12-05T13:09:00.003-06:00

GOOD. GRAVY! You have GOT to see [this]! It is Christmas GOLD!

A veritable GOLD RUSH, people.

Get thyself some gold!

Thank you Annie for introducing those of us (or maybe just me)whose lives transpire beneath a rock to the illustrious Dave Barnes video talent. I knew not the level of ya boyz skillz.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Jear's to you all!

I need Africa. Do you?

2008-12-01T13:01:00.005-06:00

Last week I told you why I need Africa. I later discovered that all these people do too!

Today, Barrett (of Mocha Club) wants you to know why he needs Africa. And from what I can tell, Barrett is the man. He lives in Ethiopia, so he knows of what he speaks. Here's where it starts...

:::I NEED AFRICA MORE THAN AFRICA NEEDS ME:::

When I think of Africa, the following images immediately come to mind: Starvation. AIDS. Child soldiers. Genocide. Sex slaves. Orphans. From there, my thoughts naturally turn to how I can help, how I can make a difference. “I am needed here,” I think. “They have so little, and I have so much.” It’s true, there are great tragedies playing out in Africa everyday. There is often a level of suffering here that is unimaginable until you have seen it, and even then it is difficult to believe. But what is even harder is reconciling the challenges that many Africans face with the joy I see in the people. It’s a joy that comes from somewhere I cannot fathom, not within the framework that has been my life to this day. [read more]

After you finish reading that, come back and watch this video.

Watching that gives me chills and that song gets into me. I don't want my circumstance to define my joy. I want to have the joy of Africa in me. I also want to help and make a difference where I can - which may look like buying a (really rad) t-shirt to support the cause of Mocha Club. Don't just envy mine. Get your own! And what you give may supply water for a year. And maybe some of Africa will get into you. I hope so!

The campaign starts here - but let's not stop talking about it!

Beyond Thankful

2008-11-28T07:46:00.007-06:00

Ten years ago, I had Thanksgiving Dinner in jail, (complete with dry, thinly sliced turkey, cornbread dressing and a cup of Kool-Aid), with a group of strangers and my twin sister. That year, I was beyond thankful to have her there with me - because it meant I wasn't alone in the scariest time of my life.

Ten years ago, on the day before Thanksgiving, we were given the option to go up on the roof to get some sunlight. Our group cell was not made of bars, but cinder blocks, like what is commonly found in High School gymnasium bathrooms - no windows. I opted out because I was going home the next day, which would've been day 4 in jail, the end of our "sentence".

Ten years ago, the next day came, but I didn't go home. Instead, I got a message that our judge was on vacation and we were going to be staying "indefinitely". That word dropped into my stomach like a bowling ball. Every day we'd ask, Is he back? When do we get to go to court and find out when we get out of here? Day after day, we got the same reply. He's on vacation, we don't know. We'll let you know when we know. Eight more days passed before we were released, bringing our grand total up to 12 days in jail.

Ten years ago, I went to court high with the full understanding of what might happen when I got there. You violate probation, they put you in the slammer. I was scared out of my skin, but I had the slightest hope we'd get a slap on the wrist. And honestly, at the time, even though I was quite sure I'd faint in front of the judge, I thought the 4 days we got in jail was a slap on the wrist. I told myself, Four days is nothin'. I can do anything for four days. However, I learned rather quickly that I can do very little indefinitely.

Ten years ago, I spent 12 days in a room where the TV was rarely off, all the calls I made were collect, and someone was always slamming a deck of cards on an aluminum table. The noise was constant. We had a communal bathroom which was wide open. Flimsy shower curtains. Short stalls around the toilets. Never any real privacy. For 12 days I wore faded, used navy blue scrubs and black plastic slippers. Every day, lunch was the same; peanut butter sandwich with a small cup of Kool-Aid. I was always thirsty. I had no blow dryer. No makeup. And most importantly, no drugs.

Ten years ago, my 12 days in jail were the first of my days of sobriety. Up to that point, I had been high every day. I couldn't even remember the last day I didn't do something - and the idea of spending the REST. OF. MY. LIFE. sober scared me more than anything.

Ten years ago, I wanted nothing to do with God. NOTHING. I continued in that way for the next two years, searching for the ever-popular Spiritual Experience - but not the God who calls Himself "I Am". And God, in His amazing grace, saw fit to set me free anyway. Because He could see His plans for me - plans to give me a hope and a future. At the time, it felt like death - which now, ten years down the road, I've learned seems to be God's way to freedom.

And ten years later, I am beyond thankful for that.

We went through fire and through water;
Yet Thou didst bring us out into a place of abundance.

I Need Africa

2008-11-24T10:41:00.006-06:00

I was asked by Mocha Club to write about the concept of why, 'I need Africa more than Africa needs me'. Mocha Club is a community-based website where members can start a team and invite friends to join them in giving $7 a month - the cost of 2 mochas - to support a project in Africa. Mocha Club's vision is to provide a way for people who don't have hundreds or thousands of dollars to make a difference in Africa.

Which is good, because that means I can be useful too!

From where I sit in my life, it is obvious to me that I need Africa more than Africa needs me. What my flesh is and desires is painfully clear -- and I can say with some certainty that what I can offer in the way of giving of myself doesn't amount to much.

Like I said in the previous post, I've never been to Africa, but something in me already loves it. If given the chance, I would love to go... because I need Africa.

Need & Lack. To see with my own eyes, the heart and struggle of an AIDS infected single Mom, who has to feed her babies just like I do; and yet, I live such a cushioned, sheltered life that I never truly worry where our food will come from... I need Africa.

Disappointment. I have wrestled with disappointment and injustice in my own life and I have cultivated a spirit that can be very demanding of the Spirit of God. But disappointment is not an end. I have seen God use it in my life to bring me to brokenness, which has always lead to freedom. Africa, with its real need and personal disappointment offers perspective. I need Africa.

Beauty. I have never seen any face more beautiful than the stunning, black faces of Africa. ...And in spite of poverty and crisis, Africa has so much beauty to offer - beyond the faces of the people and the land. God offers beauty for ashes. I need Africa.

Share your thoughts in my comments, and even blog about it yourself. Discuss. :)

I need Africa more than Africa needs me.

Do you?

And then come back on December 1st - when we can stop singin' it and start bringin' it!

Prelude

2008-11-22T16:06:00.006-06:00

When Annie first posted about the Mocha Club and their new campaign launch, the words that snagged me were: "All you have to have is a blog and a heart for Africa. That's it."

I've never been to Africa, but something in me already loves it.

Also, I think Annie ROCKS THE CASBAH - even though we've never met. Sometimes people are so transparent you feel like you know them. Annie has posted so much of her heart that I, her imaginary friend (for now), feel in part, like I know her and can trust her. If Annie says it's cool, it's because it's cool. If she says it's funny, you better get ready to laugh yourself slackjawed. That's all I'm sayin'.

I think you'll want to see what the Mocha Club is up to though - because there's a very good chance you will want to get involved! You may be amazed by how much your little can do.

I need Africa more than Africa needs me.

Steel Magnolias (or my alternate title: You'll Never Believe This Because I Look Like I Grew Up In Church)

2008-11-14T14:21:00.008-06:00

A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away... or you know, back when I was 13, I thought I was bad.

I found some well-priced steel-toe combat boots that I liked to wear paired with a short teal and white floral print rayon mini skirt. Because nothing says "mean" like combat boots and rayon. I would iron all the wrinkles out of my pretty skirt, lace up my knee-high black (tough) boots and go for a walk around the neighborhood. Sometimes I packed my butterfly knife that I found somewhere one time.

(Criminal disposal maybe?)(Which of course made me feel even more indestructible and above the law.)

And then there were times I packed my brass knuckles.

I was tough. And edgy.

Everything about me said, "Do not mess with this girl. She will cut you."

Except for the floral rayon.

One day, this ~~thug~~ girl found out I had kissed her boyfriend. In short, she had beef with me. So she confronted me in the street. In front of her ~~little friends~~ minions. She cussed me lower than a snake's belly and then she slapped me in the face.

Hard.

I was put in my place. Effective immediately.

I turned to make my walk of shame back home, hot tears rolling down my face, my heart pounding in my chest and throat, telling myself lies, like, if I had had my brass knuckles, she wouldn'tna handled me like that. I'da taken her down.

I think the case had already been solved though, who the real gangsta was.

I got in front of my house(finally). But not forgetting about my hard thuggish image, with a final jolt of gall, I turned back to where she was still standing (and laughing)(at the far end of the street) and I screamed some profanity and called her some classy names and then I turned and ran into my house.

Because I was bad.

True story.

**Edited to add: After reading this again, it sounds as though I was your regular run-of-the-mill bully. This was absolutely not the case. This whole story took place on weekend visitation at my moms - hence, not my hometown - AND WAS AN ISOLATED INCIDENT! I tried to "be somebody else" over there. Or at least give it a valiant effort. Truth is, I was not hard at all. (As evidenced here.) I was just really into this dude that was a straight thug and all I did was DRESS THE PART. The end. I was only trying to be what I thought he wanted. Inside, and outside evidently, I was just a big softie. And I prefer me like that.

Cuteness with skin on.

2008-11-13T01:35:00.001-06:00

And also, consider this very robust applause to be yours, Rachel! Because you won my very great and awesome giveaway! You guessed 37 days. My guess is roughly 42 days, give or take, so you win!! Congratulations!

Stretch almost won because he guessed 41 days, but his guess was not documented herein, therefore, etc. etc, and so his prize is now null and void, etc. etc. and will now be passed onto the next best guesser.

And now, with this great prize, you, Rachel, will undoubtedly (or you know, undoubtably, if you wish), be the absolute envy of your friends.

I mean, who doesn't want some rousing applause? Hm?

Thaaaat's what I thought.

Slap Me Some Skin

2008-11-12T14:10:00.003-06:00

Thanks BooMama! You have increased the delight of the world at least two-fold.

Sugar.

2008-11-12T09:18:00.004-06:00

Bed piled with plastic ponies and Care Bears galore, Sugarhead smiles big and exclaims, "I have ALOT of friends!"

My heart smiles.

Later, her Daddy goes in to check on her. This is how he finds her; cupcake crown securely on her head, exclaiming to all, Happy Birthday! I am 4 today! ...nevermind that her birthday was 2 weeks ago and her party, 3 days behind her.

I think she's very happy to be four.

And again, my heart smiles.

I made you a delicious bass.

2008-11-11T17:22:00.002-06:00

"Mmmm, something smells good."

"It's the fish, baby."

"It smells like barbecued chicken."

And off he runs, back to his toys.

BRILLIANT.

2008-11-10T11:01:00.002-06:00

Even if you don't like Star Wars. If you're one of those people, I don't even want to know.

If at first you don't succeed...

2008-11-09T15:15:00.003-06:00

...try, try again. As they say. This time the balls did not defeat me.
This time, I won.
Happy Birthday to you (again) Sugarhead! Your Mama loves you!

Closer...
So close you can almost taste it...
saith the evil woman.

Success!
And she lived happily ever after.

The giving, it continues.

2008-11-06T14:20:00.003-06:00

We all have dirty secrets. Some dirtier than others.

Today I vacuumed. It's been a while since the last time so I figured, hey! We're having company this weekend.... why not today? Why do I avoid that particular chore?

Exhibit A. My vacuum really sucks.

Really. Sucks.

(All of my aversions have very good reasons.)

But talking about how filthy your floors really are is putting yourself on shaky ground, is it not. It's like saying, "I went three days without a shower." It's better to talk about those things as past tense.

Not, say, this week. That's how you lose friends.

But today, I cleaned my putrid carpets. And of course I'm playing fast and loose with the word "cleaned" because I'll refer you back to Exhibit A.

We're down to two. Rooms that is. Two rooms with carpet.

So today, I'm giving something else away, because I'm a giver. A great prize at that.

Answer this question: Not counting today, how many days has it been since I last vacuumed?

Whoever guesses closest to my guess will win a very robust round of applause.

By the end of this you will feel so good about how clean your house is.

I may never recover, but you will feel like a MILLION BUCKS.

I do so much for y'all.

Indulgence

2008-11-06T11:24:00.003-06:00

I baked a cake today so that I could try my hand at a second attempt at the Cake Balls that so utterly flopped previously. I would link back to them, but they were just so ugly.

The edges of my cakes came out a little too hard.

So I ate them.

All of them.

The years teach much...

2008-11-05T14:21:00.000-06:00

that the days never know.

Safety Tat Winners

2008-11-04T17:15:00.001-06:00

Congratulations! Here are the winners of the (totally awesome) Safety Tat 6pks! I truly wish you could all win (or that I could keep them all)! Here are the random numbers:

Random Integer Generator
24
3
17

Timestamp: 2008-11-04 18:39:29 UTC

24 - Chantelle
3 - Trish @ Sweet 'N' Sassy Girls
17 - Shalyse @ Life, Isn't it Great

Thanks for entering my giveaway and have a sweet day!

And to all my faithful sweethearts that I adore and appreciate so much, I did not mean to communicate that I might quit blogging altogether. Let's don't be silly. I love blogging! And clearly you don't know my obsession as well as I thought... I have no intention whatsoever of stopping.

None.

Zero.

Dually noted.

Didn't mean to frighten you there. See you soon!

Two things.

2008-11-02T17:47:00.004-06:00

First, Canton was very good to me. Very good. I had a great time. Pretty much finished one scarf and made some progress on the second. Bought some delight-inducing goodies and had some good visit-time weaved in and out. It was good. Something I hope to repeat somewhere in the not too distant future.

Oh, and I think it's worth noting that Canton is into the dogs. You can buy more clothes for your dog than you can shake a stick at. We even saw a lady who was wearing her dog in a baby sling-type contraption and her (poor, to-be-pitied) dog was wearing pink sunglasses. Yes it was.

It really is no wonder dogs bite people.

Second, I've been kicking around some things in my brain concerning this blog. I have, unintentionally, cultivated the habit of posting almost every day, whether I had something to say or not... lately it feels mostly like not and my blog is becoming something I have hoped it would not be.

I feel like this online life gets the best of my time sometimes. I may begin to post less regularly because for me, I want the things I say to be worth the time it takes to say (and read) them and if most of my time is spent sitting here reading about y'all or posting about me, then that doesn't leave much time for living.

I need to get my head into my home, and into some great books. I need to take some good stuff in before I can spit any good stuff out.

Annie (Maundering Pondering) said it best in something she posted recently. ...In her words (which are far better than mine): Before I can produce, I need to consume – through reading, and thinkin, and observing, and mulling things over. I need to interact with people (real humans), and go running, and listen, and nest,...I need to spend time living in order to find things to write about.... So in the coming days and weeks, I might not post as regularly. Or maybe I will – I don’t know. I suppose I’m just giving myself permission to let the thoughts ebb and flow, and to hold off until the light goes on.

All I can add is, amen to that sister.

Amen to that.

Safety Tat Giveaway

2008-10-29T11:52:00.008-05:00

Today is awesome! And I'll tell you why.

I recently learned of a product called Safety Tat and was so very excited that I sent out an email to just about every Mom in my address book! I didn't know that something like this existed and I'm thrilled about it because I think it is genius! What mother hasn't worried about her child's safety?

Today, my lucky lucky friends, you are eligible to win one of three most impressive prizes from Safety Tat! I contacted them and asked if I could host a giveaway here and they said yes!

WIN one of three Quick Stick Write-On Safety Tat 6-pack packages!

Here's what Safety Tat says about this product:

Our Quick Stick Write-On! Is a waterless application and comes in two
designs "Tat" and "Tessa" (pictured above). Quick Sticks last an extra long time: up to two
weeks. It is waterproof.

Our Original SafetyTats are available in a large variety of designs. Original SafetyTats
require water to apply. They last between 1 and 5 days.
We suggest a new Original SafetyTat be applied each day. Also waterproof.

A few (but not all) of the other designs available for purchase:
The Allergy Alert really caught my attention. Having children with allergies, some severe, can be frightening. I can't always be everywhere my children are, so these would ease my mind tremendously.

How to Win:
1. Go and have a look around the Safety Tat website. Come back here and tell me which tat is your favorite.
2. Be sure to include a valid email address in the body of your comment. If you are uncomfortable publicizing your email address, you may also email me and leave your comment that way.
3. I will randomly draw winners on Monday, November 3rd.
4. I'll contact you by Tuesday, November 4th to let you know you've won. That's it!

For more FREE STUFF, check out the Bloggy Giveaways Carnival!

Let the jollification commence!

2008-10-29T09:55:00.000-05:00

It's finally time!

Time to go to CANTON Trade Days! We leave tomorrow. The drive is seven hours, y'all. Seven. I should be thankful though, because it allows me precious, and much-needed, time to knit. And knit I shall.

I have a great deal of work ahead of me so that I can finish my Christmas projects. I'll try to finish 2 scarves on this trip, and then I think I'm gonna jump tracks and do the next two in completely different styles. I'm thinking maybe something like this: [no needles and crying required] [or seven hour road trips] [This new style may become my new addiction. Because you know I'm always looking for a new one.]

Personally, I think scarves are great gifts because they're wallet-friendly and no one will think you're cheap for buying an inexpensive gift because the real investment is your time.

However, that is not to say that expensive gifts are tacky or less worthy of our love. I love gifts of all kinds. I do not discriminate. Gifts are my secondary love language. A veryvery(almost too close to call)close second. {The first is time, in case you're wondering.}

Take for instance, these shoes.

I would be supremely happy to own these. In fact, I have convinced myself that I NEED them. I've got it on good authority that they are quite comfortable and I need a stylish and comfortable shoe to traipse around New York when that time comes. [squeal] So, you can see, I neeeed these. They are not, however, wallet-friendly.

I'm gonna have to save my pecans [puh-kahns] to buy these. And I will.

You can bet I will.

Because those red shoes (which I will heretofore refer to as Walking On Sunshine)? They can save the world. I just know it.

Or maybe just the day. Either way you look at it, they're magical.

So if you're in the gifting mood, I'd be happy to be your chosen recipient. But only for your sake, so that you can know the joy of giving. Because I am a giver.

Otherwise I'll just buy them with my Christmas money. Christmas money is the bomb.

Have a good weekend y'all! See ya on Monday!

It's a good thing that love knows not ugly.

2008-10-27T10:55:00.005-05:00

Today is my sweet Sugarhead's 4th birthday! She is so pumped and declared this morning that she's "almost five now".

Indeed.

Too almost.

Happy Birthday, sweet girl. I hope that deep in your heart you know that we embrace you into our family; that we accept you and love you so much. I hope that that truth never leaves your heart. I'm so glad you're ours.

As part of our girl's special day, I promised cupcakes or something of their likeness for snack time at school today. I found a recipe for Cake Balls a few months ago and have been waiting and waiting for her birthday to try it out because they are SO. SO. CUTE. And they look very tasty.

Sugarhead decided she wanted strawberry cake with strawberry icing because, well, it's pink, and nothing else matters.

This is my sad, sad attempt. I had "issues" with the chocolate. I think I know where I went wrong, so I know what to change for next time. I seriously hope to get the hang of these because I would like them to become standard birthday fare around here. The possibilities are endless. And so is the cuteness. {Go click around Bakerella's Pop Central if you don't believe me.}

So here, in all their ugliness... my cake balls.

You may notice that I chose to drizzle instead of dunk, due to may aforementioned issues with the chocolate. You may also notice that I tried (to no avail) to salvage them and attempt to elevate their cuteness with pink candy sprinkles. But the sprinkles? They did not cooperate.

Much to my chagrin.

But I figure, hey, my target audience falls between the ages of 3 and 4 years old... they know not ugly sugar.

Even when that sugar is absolutely butt ugly.

Happy Birthday sweet girl! I hope your cake balls make you happy! :)